I posted these last year and I loved reading back over them, but FB won't let me copy & paste, so I'm only re-typing the kids quotes (because they're the best anyway.)
"Before my tummy gets hungry again, could you make it some pancakes?" -Kasey
"Mom, are you ever going to get hurt really bad? It would be really fun for me to call 911. Probably not for you, though." -Zac
"Sorry, I forgot I was naked." -Kasey, after being told she had to get dressed before she could draw a picture
"I just washed this hand; the other one wasn't very dirty." -Kasey
"Mommy, you have the most beautiful voice I've ever heard. Except when you yell; then it's kind of terrible." -Zac
"Mommy, why don't you send more mail? Is it because you don't like people very much?" -Zac
"Mommy, don't ever read this book to me. We read it at school and they tried to cook a guy and eat him and he was naked. It was awful and really disgusting." -Zac
"None of these dresses is spinny enough." -Kasey
"Mommy, gross. Next time just use water and don't spit on me." -Kasey
"Here's his leg." -Kasey, handing me the leg of the junebug I busted her trying to get into the car with
"He's nothing but a liar! I thought he was my friend! Today was the worst day of my entire life." -Zac, after his best friend played tic-tac-toe with a girl instead of him
"Are you going to buy me any Christmas presents this year? Because I really want more bubble bath." -Kasey...on the toilet...while I was taking a bath next to it
"I think that maybe this book is probably a little too scary for me." -Kasey (Bunnicula)
"Dear God, thank you for making the world and thank you for our food and thank you that Daddy is working and I got some duct tape and Mommy made me a Darth Maul lightsaber. Amen" -Zac
"Why doesn't Kasey like it when I punch her?" -Zac
"Does it look like I have snot on my face? Don't worry, it's not. It's just dog slobber." -Kasey
"Maybe they went to Heaven. They are really old." -Zac, when I told him my grandparents weren't home
"Mommy is a camel who doesn't know how to read..." -part of an odd song my kids made up
"Cooco, Momo, Gigi, Mamochichu, Chungley, Lagamachu and Brucie." -names Kasey made up for sharks that she drew
Kasey says the Rangers are playing Hastings (Houston) tonight, and she hopes the Pink Sox win.
"I was afraid you might be kissing." -Zac, on why he didn't open the door to talk to us
"I love you ,Mommy. I'll see you in the morning." -Kasey...at 6. I asked if she was going to bed and she said, "No, I just didn't want to have to say it later."
"The Death Eater has tried every cookie in the land." -Zac, wearing a Darth Vader helmet shell and his Venom mask
"I accidentally snorted some Coke." -Zac (luckily this was a soda reference and not a recreational habit)
"It's okay, I can handle it; I'm very brave. I can kill spiders, you know. I'm also not afraid of bees." -Zac, when I told him it was dangerous being a police officer
"That guy must have really hated parades." -Zac, after I explained how JFK was assasinated
"She said our name like 'penis'!" -Zac, laughing hysterically
"I wish we lived in the jungle and we could eat food right off of the trees and fight tigers. Did Bear Grylls used to be Anthony from the Wiggles? Because he wears a lot of blue and talks like him. Do you think he sings a lot? I wish our house had stairs and we had a robot to vacuum and clean up all of our toys. Why aren't you my teacher? Why can't I go to school at home?" -Zac, in one breath with no pauses at dinner
"The Jedi Master has forgotten his weapon." -Zac (I responded with "A Jedi's greatest weapon is his mind." Sometimes I just can't help myself.)
"Here's the mommy, the daddy, the kids, and the pizza man." -Kasey, naming the vital roles while playing house
"I really wish you had named me Batman." -Zac
"Do bananas have seeds?" no. "Then what is this?" -Zac, holding up the tooth that was no longer just loose
"I made it dead with my hands. I should probably use some hand sanitizer." -Kasey, expert fly killer
"Zachary, you're my best friend in the whole world." -Kasey
"Don't worry, Mommy can fix it. Mommy can do anything. Except fly." -Zac
I have some skin left over!" -Kasey, wrapping up in her towel after her bath
"Mommy, can you please change your face? That one looks really cranky." -Kasey
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Living With A Hernia
You would think I hate writing, as often as I take breaks from blogging. Not true, my friends, not true. I've just been busy living...or something like that. So, where were we? Aside from my soapbox departure from the norm. (Btw, I may start wearing that soapbox out pretty soon. It may become the norm.)
Josh's grandpa died (a great relief for him, sad for his family) so, rather than put the kids through 12 hours of driving + a funeral, we spent the night before and after at a hotel at the halfway point. It cut into our emergency fund and we didn't do anything great and exciting, but it was a departure from the every day and well worth it. (Plus, there was lots of swimming and a hot tub. Woo hoo!)
2 Days before my birthday, my abdomen started hurting and I wrote it off as a muscle cramp or gas for abour 6 hours and finally, around midnight, Josh pointed out the fact that I could no longer stand up straight and I was doubled over, pacing because it hurt too much to do anything else. After he told me he could see the lump I was complaining about from across the room, he said he was taking me to the ER. The doctor declared it a umbilical hernia and proceeded to try to force my internal organs back through the hole from whence they came. (OW!) They made a little progress and then admitted me to the hospital and 9 hours later, they did emergency surgery. I was cut and stitched and meshed and steri-stripped and gauzed and a slapped back together and then told not to anything. Seriously. ANYTHING. After a week, I was told to do practically nothing for 2-3 weeks. That was about a week ago and I've been breaking the rules more than I probably should, but I'm trying to be relatively good. (I can't neglect my garden, it's my baby.)
Speaking of which, the garden is amazing. Corn, strawberries, squash, peas, potatoes, tomatoes, bell peppers, watermelon, cantelope, pumpkins, zucchini & cilantro are all going strong. Summer is officially here, the kids have been out of school for a week and I'm ready to be back in action. More on all of this to come.
Josh's grandpa died (a great relief for him, sad for his family) so, rather than put the kids through 12 hours of driving + a funeral, we spent the night before and after at a hotel at the halfway point. It cut into our emergency fund and we didn't do anything great and exciting, but it was a departure from the every day and well worth it. (Plus, there was lots of swimming and a hot tub. Woo hoo!)
2 Days before my birthday, my abdomen started hurting and I wrote it off as a muscle cramp or gas for abour 6 hours and finally, around midnight, Josh pointed out the fact that I could no longer stand up straight and I was doubled over, pacing because it hurt too much to do anything else. After he told me he could see the lump I was complaining about from across the room, he said he was taking me to the ER. The doctor declared it a umbilical hernia and proceeded to try to force my internal organs back through the hole from whence they came. (OW!) They made a little progress and then admitted me to the hospital and 9 hours later, they did emergency surgery. I was cut and stitched and meshed and steri-stripped and gauzed and a slapped back together and then told not to anything. Seriously. ANYTHING. After a week, I was told to do practically nothing for 2-3 weeks. That was about a week ago and I've been breaking the rules more than I probably should, but I'm trying to be relatively good. (I can't neglect my garden, it's my baby.)
Speaking of which, the garden is amazing. Corn, strawberries, squash, peas, potatoes, tomatoes, bell peppers, watermelon, cantelope, pumpkins, zucchini & cilantro are all going strong. Summer is officially here, the kids have been out of school for a week and I'm ready to be back in action. More on all of this to come.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Preachy McPreacherson
Dangit, Alfred, start remembering my password!
Typically, I try to keep my blogging lighthearted and leave religion and philosophy on the back burner, but I'm being convicted to pull all of that to the front lines today. In Sunday school last week, we were discussing evangelism, and I said that I felt that most people get so caught up in trying to find a way to talk ABOUT Jesus that they forget how to BE Jesus to people. The Holy Spirit (yeah, I said it) likes to teach me through insomnia, so I've spent several sleepless nights pondering this idea more thoroughly. My conclusion is as follows:
As children, we are taught that God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit are one. While this is true, it is also not true. Each has a very specific purpose in our lives and should be viewed as such. God is supreme. He is The Ruler and The Authority. He has the power to build up and tear down nations. He holds all the blueprints to life and has the power to judge and condemn or give pardons.
We are not God. We are not made to pass judgements or condemn anyone or raise ourselves above anyone else. And yet, we do it time after time after time. And worst of all, we often do it in the name of God.
Jesus came to teach us to love and accept everyone of every color, nation, creed or other difference. John Lennon's song, Imagine (which is often viewed as pagan or blasphemous, etc.,) asks us to picture a world where only the people matter; where actions are performed without thought to how it might make them look or change their status or help their cause. He asks us to strip away our nationality, religion, political affiliation, material wealth, social status, etc. and to love one another because it's the right thing to do. Jesus asked the same of all of us. (I find it ironic that John Lennon is best known for claiming to be "bigger than Jesus" when he was only pointing out that kids were more interested in music than organized religion - but, that's an arguement for another day. I'm also very troubled by the fact that John Lennon wrote a letter to Oral Roberts, asking if Jesus was really the answer and if "it is all true" and Roberts' response was basically that God was different for different people and he should "pray about it." Ugh. No wonder Lennon had such issues with religion. )
The bottom line is, we've been spending too much time being God and not enough time being Jesus. We use Jesus as the phrase "WWJD" and put it on bracelets and t-shirts and bumper stickers, but it's mostly meaningless or used as a "holier than thou" expression. Jesus didn't cut people off in traffic or look down on the guy that didn't change out of his work shirt before church or any number of other things people in the Church are guilty of. The Ten Commandments were set up as a reminder of the love God holds for us and the covenant He made with Abraham. It's like a marriage vow - We promise to "love, cherish, honor" and all of that, but if those vows were written in Old Testament times, they would have read "I will not do this and I will not do that..." Marriage is not a list of rules and neither is a relationship with God. In the same way, relationship is built through dialogue, conversation and give-and-take. No one is interested in a one-sided friendship and neither is God. God created us for curiosity, questioning and mystery solving. If he had wanted lemmings, he would have created us as such.
I think the Bible verse that sums my opinion up the best is in I Samuel "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." It's all about where your heart is. As the wise Willy Wonka once said "So shines a good deed in a weary world." People aren't looking for a sermon, they're searching for understanding. They don't want someone to point out their inadequacies, they want some one to say "it's okay to be you." That's who Jesus was and is. He's the hope when things look hopeless. He's the ear to listen when everyone else is too busy. He's the one who understands why we make the decisions we do and loves us regardless of the choices we make. That's who we need to be to those around us. Not perfect, not blameless, not better, just there. Willing to listen and not judge. Helping without hurting.
The Holy Spirit or Holy Ghost has just about been written off completely. By using the term "Spirit" we aren't sure where this part of God fits in. He's a ghost that once haunted people and caused them to speak in tongues or gave them visions or sent them into fugue states or a number of other things that make us shudder with uncomfortableness. He's the angel on the shoulder, condemning you for your temptations. I think we would be better off calling Him the Holy Soul or the Holy Heart or the Holy Mind, even. The spirit is supposed to be what makes us human, that part that separates us from animals. The "God-part" where "made in His image" comes from. Our intuition and "gut-feelings" and the part of us that loves and hates and understands is our spirit. This is where God speaks to us and we should be terribly excited about it, and yet, most of us are ignoring Him! We dismiss "coincidences" as just that. We talk to God, but we don't step back and listen for His response. My devotion yesterday was very appropriate here (and surely was meant to be) "Though you are an earthen vessel, you were meant to be filled with heavenly contents. Your weakness is not a deterrent to being filled with My Spirit; on the contrary, it provides an opportunity for My Power to shine forth more brightly." We need to start heeding the Spirit. We should start asking Him to point out areas we need to work on and people who need our help. All we need to do is ask and He'll tell us, we just get so "busy" with trivial things that we don't take the time to slow down and listen. We've grown accustomed to a "fast food" lifestyle and we expect God to be just the same.
When we start humbling ourselves before God, listening to the Spirit for guidance and then applying the wisdom we're given to help the brokenhearted and desperate, as Jesus would have done, then I think we understand the Holy Trinity as it was meant to be utilized.
The last thing I want to do is to judge or condemn or convict anyone else, that isn't my job. This is also wordier than I intended it to be, but I feel very strongly about it all the same.
Typically, I try to keep my blogging lighthearted and leave religion and philosophy on the back burner, but I'm being convicted to pull all of that to the front lines today. In Sunday school last week, we were discussing evangelism, and I said that I felt that most people get so caught up in trying to find a way to talk ABOUT Jesus that they forget how to BE Jesus to people. The Holy Spirit (yeah, I said it) likes to teach me through insomnia, so I've spent several sleepless nights pondering this idea more thoroughly. My conclusion is as follows:
As children, we are taught that God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit are one. While this is true, it is also not true. Each has a very specific purpose in our lives and should be viewed as such. God is supreme. He is The Ruler and The Authority. He has the power to build up and tear down nations. He holds all the blueprints to life and has the power to judge and condemn or give pardons.
We are not God. We are not made to pass judgements or condemn anyone or raise ourselves above anyone else. And yet, we do it time after time after time. And worst of all, we often do it in the name of God.
Jesus came to teach us to love and accept everyone of every color, nation, creed or other difference. John Lennon's song, Imagine (which is often viewed as pagan or blasphemous, etc.,) asks us to picture a world where only the people matter; where actions are performed without thought to how it might make them look or change their status or help their cause. He asks us to strip away our nationality, religion, political affiliation, material wealth, social status, etc. and to love one another because it's the right thing to do. Jesus asked the same of all of us. (I find it ironic that John Lennon is best known for claiming to be "bigger than Jesus" when he was only pointing out that kids were more interested in music than organized religion - but, that's an arguement for another day. I'm also very troubled by the fact that John Lennon wrote a letter to Oral Roberts, asking if Jesus was really the answer and if "it is all true" and Roberts' response was basically that God was different for different people and he should "pray about it." Ugh. No wonder Lennon had such issues with religion. )
The bottom line is, we've been spending too much time being God and not enough time being Jesus. We use Jesus as the phrase "WWJD" and put it on bracelets and t-shirts and bumper stickers, but it's mostly meaningless or used as a "holier than thou" expression. Jesus didn't cut people off in traffic or look down on the guy that didn't change out of his work shirt before church or any number of other things people in the Church are guilty of. The Ten Commandments were set up as a reminder of the love God holds for us and the covenant He made with Abraham. It's like a marriage vow - We promise to "love, cherish, honor" and all of that, but if those vows were written in Old Testament times, they would have read "I will not do this and I will not do that..." Marriage is not a list of rules and neither is a relationship with God. In the same way, relationship is built through dialogue, conversation and give-and-take. No one is interested in a one-sided friendship and neither is God. God created us for curiosity, questioning and mystery solving. If he had wanted lemmings, he would have created us as such.
I think the Bible verse that sums my opinion up the best is in I Samuel "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." It's all about where your heart is. As the wise Willy Wonka once said "So shines a good deed in a weary world." People aren't looking for a sermon, they're searching for understanding. They don't want someone to point out their inadequacies, they want some one to say "it's okay to be you." That's who Jesus was and is. He's the hope when things look hopeless. He's the ear to listen when everyone else is too busy. He's the one who understands why we make the decisions we do and loves us regardless of the choices we make. That's who we need to be to those around us. Not perfect, not blameless, not better, just there. Willing to listen and not judge. Helping without hurting.
The Holy Spirit or Holy Ghost has just about been written off completely. By using the term "Spirit" we aren't sure where this part of God fits in. He's a ghost that once haunted people and caused them to speak in tongues or gave them visions or sent them into fugue states or a number of other things that make us shudder with uncomfortableness. He's the angel on the shoulder, condemning you for your temptations. I think we would be better off calling Him the Holy Soul or the Holy Heart or the Holy Mind, even. The spirit is supposed to be what makes us human, that part that separates us from animals. The "God-part" where "made in His image" comes from. Our intuition and "gut-feelings" and the part of us that loves and hates and understands is our spirit. This is where God speaks to us and we should be terribly excited about it, and yet, most of us are ignoring Him! We dismiss "coincidences" as just that. We talk to God, but we don't step back and listen for His response. My devotion yesterday was very appropriate here (and surely was meant to be) "Though you are an earthen vessel, you were meant to be filled with heavenly contents. Your weakness is not a deterrent to being filled with My Spirit; on the contrary, it provides an opportunity for My Power to shine forth more brightly." We need to start heeding the Spirit. We should start asking Him to point out areas we need to work on and people who need our help. All we need to do is ask and He'll tell us, we just get so "busy" with trivial things that we don't take the time to slow down and listen. We've grown accustomed to a "fast food" lifestyle and we expect God to be just the same.
When we start humbling ourselves before God, listening to the Spirit for guidance and then applying the wisdom we're given to help the brokenhearted and desperate, as Jesus would have done, then I think we understand the Holy Trinity as it was meant to be utilized.
The last thing I want to do is to judge or condemn or convict anyone else, that isn't my job. This is also wordier than I intended it to be, but I feel very strongly about it all the same.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Camp Ennis
We've made it until Friday at last. Spring Break has been completely action packed - I'll need at least a week to recover myself. "Camp Ennis" has been an ongoing endeavor, playing outside in the backyard tent, roasting hotdogs and marshmallows and sleeping in tents in the living room. We stayed in a hotel with a mini indoor waterpark to kick things off and we've been to the Tulsa Air & Space Museum, the Jenks Aquarium and the Tulsa Zoo - and renewed our memberships for the year, insuring many many more visits. Today I'm setting up a mystery to be solved by my little detectives (I'm thinking a jewel heist of some sort.) I have a migraine, so my heart isn't in it like I hoped it would be. Naturally, Josh and I are having the first date night we've had in months tonight. Yesterday, he tilled the garden for me, so the plan is to start planting on Easter, after the snow is over. (I thought we would make Easter a symbolic day for planting "new life.") I'm hoping to add a touch of Alice in Wonderland to the garden this year. I'm all about whimsy.
Friday, March 5, 2010
Good Day Sunshine
I was right about Spring waiting in the wings. Today was so warm and sunny. Kasey and I spent all afternoon hauling rocks and shoveling dirt and repairing all the damage the backhow did to the front yard during the water leak repair. There was enough rock and dirt to do a little free landscaping; it killed my back, but it looks pretty good. I can't wait to plant flowers...and don't even get me started on my vegetable garden. It's going to be spectacular.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Today is the first day of the rest...
Spring is coming. I heard it yesterday. I had begun to think Winter had set up camp and begun working on a permanent residence, but I smelled watermelon and sunshine on the breeze yesterday afternoon and I knew Spring was waiting at the airport. It should be no time at all until I'm complaining about how hot it is.
As you can see from my intro, I'm feeling poetic and a little nosalgic today, so I thought I'd go for another Top 5.
You know those moments in time, when everything is absolutely perfect for just a fleeting second, and if you could stop the world and live in that moment, you would? Here are my Top 5, in no particular order. I'm hoping for plenty more to follow.
1. I've just turned 11. Junior high and adolescence and all the angst and drama that go with it are on the horizon, but for the moment, I am truly a child. The fireworks are exploding in a bright stream of noise and magnificence behind Cinderella's Castle. I'm riding a carousel horse, with my brand new satin princess hat on my head, purchased just minutes earlier at the Mad Hatter's Shop. "When You Wish Upon a Star," is playing overhead, my cousins, aka my best friends in the whole wide world, are sitting on either side of me, and tears are running down my face because the experience is a million times more magical than I had ever expected it to be.
2. I've just started college. I've left my easel and canvas, with all the smells of oil paint and turpentine and liquin indoors and gone outside to sketch the students milling around on the lawn. The sun is shining and reflecting off the pond and the breeze is warm. After an hour or so, I decide to skip my next class and throw everything into the car, where I spend the next couple of hours doing nothing but driving with the windows down and the music turned up.
3. It's the summer before my junior year of high school. I've been dating this guy for a couple of months and watching him play hockey with his friends for weeks now. I bring my skates and waste time skating around by myself, waiting to skate with him. I'm sitting down to take my skates off, when their leader, who is everyone's hero and far above questioning, tells me I'm no longer allowed to skate there without playing some hockey (which I've secretly been dying to do) and hands me a stick. I've been accepted into this boys' club and I'm excited and yet, I don't want to disappoint anyone. I live and breathe hockey for the rest of the summer.
4. We're on vacation together and the weather's still a little chilly. We've been through museums and malls, a zoo and a lot of pasta, steak and cheesecake. He hasn't proposed yet, but I know it's only a matter of time. When you're with someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, you can feel it. It seems like we have all the time in the world and our lives are stretched out before us, ready to become whatever we decide to make of them.
5. It's just last summer. The sun is high in the sky and you almost have to squint in the brightness. It's Kasey's first time at the lake and she has absolutely no fear of the water, bounding right in, splashing water everywhere. We spend the afternoon swimming, snacking and building an elaborate sand castle. We leave exhausted, sand-covered and deliriously happy.
I was pleased to discover how hard it was to narrow this down to just five. :)
As you can see from my intro, I'm feeling poetic and a little nosalgic today, so I thought I'd go for another Top 5.
You know those moments in time, when everything is absolutely perfect for just a fleeting second, and if you could stop the world and live in that moment, you would? Here are my Top 5, in no particular order. I'm hoping for plenty more to follow.
1. I've just turned 11. Junior high and adolescence and all the angst and drama that go with it are on the horizon, but for the moment, I am truly a child. The fireworks are exploding in a bright stream of noise and magnificence behind Cinderella's Castle. I'm riding a carousel horse, with my brand new satin princess hat on my head, purchased just minutes earlier at the Mad Hatter's Shop. "When You Wish Upon a Star," is playing overhead, my cousins, aka my best friends in the whole wide world, are sitting on either side of me, and tears are running down my face because the experience is a million times more magical than I had ever expected it to be.
2. I've just started college. I've left my easel and canvas, with all the smells of oil paint and turpentine and liquin indoors and gone outside to sketch the students milling around on the lawn. The sun is shining and reflecting off the pond and the breeze is warm. After an hour or so, I decide to skip my next class and throw everything into the car, where I spend the next couple of hours doing nothing but driving with the windows down and the music turned up.
3. It's the summer before my junior year of high school. I've been dating this guy for a couple of months and watching him play hockey with his friends for weeks now. I bring my skates and waste time skating around by myself, waiting to skate with him. I'm sitting down to take my skates off, when their leader, who is everyone's hero and far above questioning, tells me I'm no longer allowed to skate there without playing some hockey (which I've secretly been dying to do) and hands me a stick. I've been accepted into this boys' club and I'm excited and yet, I don't want to disappoint anyone. I live and breathe hockey for the rest of the summer.
4. We're on vacation together and the weather's still a little chilly. We've been through museums and malls, a zoo and a lot of pasta, steak and cheesecake. He hasn't proposed yet, but I know it's only a matter of time. When you're with someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, you can feel it. It seems like we have all the time in the world and our lives are stretched out before us, ready to become whatever we decide to make of them.
5. It's just last summer. The sun is high in the sky and you almost have to squint in the brightness. It's Kasey's first time at the lake and she has absolutely no fear of the water, bounding right in, splashing water everywhere. We spend the afternoon swimming, snacking and building an elaborate sand castle. We leave exhausted, sand-covered and deliriously happy.
I was pleased to discover how hard it was to narrow this down to just five. :)
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Alfred & Stephen King
I think Google changes my login info every time I log out. I love that there's a little warning box each time, like my own personal butler, Alfred, to tilt his head and "tsk, tsk" me each time. "Oooh...are you sure that's the password you want to enter? *cringing face* It's not what you typed in last time. *whispering and leaning in closer* I'd try something else first, if I were you." (I think my Alfred may be gay.) It would be more useful if he'd just remember the password for me.
It's cold. Again. I'm thinking of making the inflatable bed a permanent part of our living room arrangement. We'll all just recline while we eat and hang out, like the ancient Greeks and Romans. I think we could make it fashionable. Speaking of which, I think we should go back to dressing like them as well. I feel like the last few decades have spewed themselves back onto the shelves in some sort of awful, mismatched assortment of ripped jeans and tie-dye and flannel and leg warmers. I'm not really sure what's going on there, but I don't want to be a part of it and Miley Cyrus can't make me. Though, Alice in Wonderland is cool again and quite frankly, I'm more than a little excited about that.
The books got the best of me yesterday and I've had trouble putting them down, just as I knew I would. I love Stephen King for so many reasons (and I won't go into all of them, or we'll be here for hours) but the thing I love the very most is that he is the only author who uses the intro as a chance to have a conversation with his "Constant Reader" (an especially un-facied up conversation with profanity and vulgarity when necessary) and update you on the goings-on in the King household and whatnot and then includes all his notes about where he was and what he was doing when he wrote whatever it was. If I may steal your opening, Mr. King, in Just After Sunset he concludes the intro with this:
"And now, let me get out of your way. But before I go, I want to thank you for coming. Would I still do what I do if you didn't? Yes, indeed I would. Because it makes me happy when the words fall together and the picture comes and the make-believe people do things that delight me. But it's better with you, Constant Reader. Always better with you."
How can you not love this man? Reading him makes me want to write, and writing nearly always leads me straight back to reading. It's a vicious cycle.
It's cold. Again. I'm thinking of making the inflatable bed a permanent part of our living room arrangement. We'll all just recline while we eat and hang out, like the ancient Greeks and Romans. I think we could make it fashionable. Speaking of which, I think we should go back to dressing like them as well. I feel like the last few decades have spewed themselves back onto the shelves in some sort of awful, mismatched assortment of ripped jeans and tie-dye and flannel and leg warmers. I'm not really sure what's going on there, but I don't want to be a part of it and Miley Cyrus can't make me. Though, Alice in Wonderland is cool again and quite frankly, I'm more than a little excited about that.
The books got the best of me yesterday and I've had trouble putting them down, just as I knew I would. I love Stephen King for so many reasons (and I won't go into all of them, or we'll be here for hours) but the thing I love the very most is that he is the only author who uses the intro as a chance to have a conversation with his "Constant Reader" (an especially un-facied up conversation with profanity and vulgarity when necessary) and update you on the goings-on in the King household and whatnot and then includes all his notes about where he was and what he was doing when he wrote whatever it was. If I may steal your opening, Mr. King, in Just After Sunset he concludes the intro with this:
"And now, let me get out of your way. But before I go, I want to thank you for coming. Would I still do what I do if you didn't? Yes, indeed I would. Because it makes me happy when the words fall together and the picture comes and the make-believe people do things that delight me. But it's better with you, Constant Reader. Always better with you."
How can you not love this man? Reading him makes me want to write, and writing nearly always leads me straight back to reading. It's a vicious cycle.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Back in the saddle
I'm back by popular demand [insert fanfare here.] I will spare the details of the domino effect stomach virus, in the midst of the water main leak/repair in our front yard. (Besides, I tried writing about it a couple of weeks ago and it was eaten by that notorious internet email/blog eater, second cousin to the sock gnome. I shall call him Harold from this point forward.) Since that time, Kasey has gotten sick not once, but twice, Josh had a vesectomy, and Zac is going through bronchitis/pneumonia round 2. Today, I have a migraine and I have spent the last 3 hours lying on our inflatable mattress in the living room, eating, watching old movies and of course, feeding my Facebook addiction. I have a stack of books from the library whispering my name from the coffeetable, but I've successfully ignored them thus far. I haven't worked on any real writing in weeks either. I need some motivation.
I'm ready for Spring. I want warm breezes and open windows and digging in the dirt. I've been compiling a list of all the things I want to do with the kids this summer: museums and gardening and ice skating and weekend road trips and a million visits to the zoo and the aquarium. I think Zac may be old enough to do some of the behind-the-scenes zoo clinics this year. We're also going to try a new fruit and a new vegetable each week, in hopes that we find SOMETHING they'll eat. Last night, I let them squeeze oranges into glasses and Zac said "It tastes just like orange juice!" Yeah, we definitely have some work to do.
I'm ready for Spring. I want warm breezes and open windows and digging in the dirt. I've been compiling a list of all the things I want to do with the kids this summer: museums and gardening and ice skating and weekend road trips and a million visits to the zoo and the aquarium. I think Zac may be old enough to do some of the behind-the-scenes zoo clinics this year. We're also going to try a new fruit and a new vegetable each week, in hopes that we find SOMETHING they'll eat. Last night, I let them squeeze oranges into glasses and Zac said "It tastes just like orange juice!" Yeah, we definitely have some work to do.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Zoo
Yesterday was absolutely beautiful. George Harrison said he wrote "Here Comes the Sun" on the first warm day after a long, cold winter. Yesterday felt just like that. I loaded the kids up and we spent 3 hours walking around the zoo. Kasey had a minor meltdown, but it was nothing that a bag of Cheetos couldn't fix. Come to think of it, there's not much that a bag of Cheetos can't fix.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Resolutions
I didn't realize Taddy Porter's "private party" began with opening the Times Square New Year's Eve party live on stage - I cried like a big baby; I was so proud of them.
It's day 4 of my New Year's resolutions and so far, so good. Here is my list for this year:
- Write something every day
- Put away every load of laundry the second it comes out of the dryer (so I have no chance at
procrastinating)
- Be more positive
- Become more self-sufficient
- Learn a new skill
- Read more
It's day 4 of my New Year's resolutions and so far, so good. Here is my list for this year:
- Write something every day
- Put away every load of laundry the second it comes out of the dryer (so I have no chance at
procrastinating)
- Be more positive
- Become more self-sufficient
- Learn a new skill
- Read more
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Year in Status Updates
Here are all of my status updates from Facebook for 2009. I listed the quotes from the kids separately first, because they're better and more fun. :)
- Kasey just gave Zac a crayon and said "Eat this, you'll feel better"
- Zac asked me to tell him "every bad word there is" so he knows which ones he shouldn't say.
- Kasey's playing with pretend lizards in a dollhouse - she just told me they're eating manicotti and strawberries upstairs"
- "Please speak more loudly, my ears are turned off because they're sick" - Zac
"...down came the rain and watched the spider bounce..." - Kasey, singing Itsy Bitsy Spider
"darn it, I'm thirsty - get me some chocolate milk and a pickle!" - Kasey
"If you don't wear green tomorrow, everybody's gonna punch you." - Zac
"Daddy, don't call Mommy sweetheart; it makes me wanna throw up." - Zac
"...but Mom, how do you KNOW you're always right about everything?" - Zac
- "Well, I'm a really cute man." - Zac's response to me telling him he has a lot of friends.
- "Mommy, you look beautiful... like Catwoman." - Zac
"Why does Dora carry around all that stuff she doesn't need in her backpack? It's not very smart." - Zac's observations on Dora the Explorer
-"boogers are dirty but they're yummy too" - Kasey
- "Don't comb my hair; it hurts my feelings." - Kasey
"No Mommy, you're not beautiful yet." - Kasey's response to "Are we ready to go?"
- "Why does my cheeseburger have freckles?" - Zac, pondering the sesame seed bun at dinner
"Dear Jesus, please help our food not taste gross..." - Zac's prayer intro at dinner
"Boys don't like sharks because they're too scary. I love sharks." - Kasey (avid fan of sharks, dinosaurs and most other "scary" animals)
"Okay, tummy, I'm not going to give you anymore food if you're just going to keep hurting." - Zac
"I got a 'gina" - Kasey (repeated as a song, 30-40 times, while dancing naked in circles) next up...a talk about appropriateness and modesty...
"I just want to wear my feet today." - Kasey
"Knives aren't for fighting. They're for cutting hotdogs and opening presents." - Kasey
"Go out in the hall and my mommy will run as fast as she can to come and protect me." - Zac's response to "What should you do if you hear the tornado sirens?"
"I'm a really long awaker. I don't like to sleep ever." - Zac
"Can I just be naked in the car?" - Kasey
"I've been cracking myself up all day because I'm amazingly hilarious." - Zac
"A moosest? A gooster? A hippolo?" - 3 of Kasey's guesses for "a buffalo"
"Will you read this to me?" (whispering really quietly) "Say 'yes." - Kasey
"Sometimes when I smile, I really look like a bad guy." - Zac
"Mom, my pirate hook keeps getting stuck." "On what?" (screaming from Kasey) "On Kasey."
"Why do the Beatles want to hold my hand?" - Zac
"Mom, could you just wear that shirt at home and not to pick me up? Just wear a regular shirt next time and not something weird." -Zac (note to self: tank tops = unacceptable for mom)
"Daddy, did you pick Mommy because she was a good lookin' momma?" -Zac
"I really like school now. I didn't at first." - Zac...the day before the last day of school
"I wonder what the girl's favorite color is?" "What girl?" "The girl I'm going to marry." - Zac (my long term planner)
"I can't. There's a dinosaur in there and he might eat me." - Kasey's response when asked to take a toy to her room (it was hard to argue with and we have since rid the room of said dinosaur.)
"Mommy, I think you're just making this stuff up." - Zac, on my list of things astronauts eat (I backed up my expertise with pics of me at NASA)
"Now you look beautiful!" - Kasey, after putting a glittery princess tiara on our dog...who just sat there and looked humiliated.
"I love my daddy. Him's so cute." - Kasey
- Kasey just picked one of my socks up off the floor, licked it, made a weird face and said "This isn't Daddy's."
"When I'm a grown-up and I've got a lady, I'm taking a shower with her." - Zac
"I finished writing my book. Can you take me to the library so I can put it on the shelf and people can start checking it out?" - Zac (writer extraordinaire)
"Why did the hospital give us this girl?" - Zac, in reference to his sister
"Kasey, can you just leave me alone and let me relax for a while?" - Zac
"I don't wanna be a lady; I wanna be a dinosaur." - Kasey
" I'm not pretendin' - I'm for real-in' " - Kasey
"I think this fruit is a little too spicy for me." - Zac
"Zachary's not being polite to me!" - Kasey
"I can't see Jesus; the sky's in the way." - Zac
"Kasey, something magical happened...last night, you were sleeping, and suddenly...you became three!" - Zac (drama king and fan of all things magical)
"Mommy, I think we're having a grown-up conversation right now. I like it. We should talk like grown-ups more." - Zac
"Hey, Mom, trade me controllers; my hands are really sweaty." - Zac
"Do fairies poop?" - Zac (this should be noted in the general "Does that poop?" file, which is quite extensive and covers everything from animals to Jedi.)
"Mommy, I'm sorry we were acting like wild animals." - Zac
"Next time just say 'yes' and don't say a weird word that I don't know about." - Zac (after I explained what "indeed" meant, which I used in response to a question of his)
"Remember that gross kind of pop that tasted really yucky that Daddy got me last time when I was sick? Can I have some of that?" - Zac (willing to try anything to settle his stomach this morning - he's much better now)
"I hate eating; it just makes me have to poop...It's not funny, Mommy. I really hate pooping." -Zac
"That bad guy looks like Frank Phillips." - Zac (referring to Slugworth on Willy Wonka - he was also disappointed that Charlie didn't immediately kill Slugworth when he met him in the alley...what am I teaching this kid?)
"Mommy, doesn't the wind feel great? That's why I took off my pants." - Zac
"Stop it, Mommy, you're about to scrub my ears off!" - Kasey
answered some "where babies come from" questions this afternoon and when I asked Zac what differences he noticed about boys and girls, he said "Guys work out a lot and girls cook dinner."
- not only is Kasey referring to herself in 3rd person today, she has declared herself "the puppy," thus, "the puppy wants a snack"
"My jeans are choking me." - Kasey
"Zachary said he's going to destroy me." -Kasey
Kasey: "Zachary farted on me" Zac: "Not on purpose!"
"When people ask who drew that, tell them Zachary did. Zachary Ennis; he's my son and he lives here and he draws really scary stuff. But don't show them this one; they might get too disgusted." - Zachary Ennis...my son, who lives here...
"Darn it, I think I need to shave" - Kasey, rubbing her leg (I just had a glimpse of her at about 15...frightening)
Zac: "Did the wolf get to hold Little Red Riding Hood?" Me: "I don't think so" Zac: "Good. She must have listened to her mom." (listening to Sam Sham & the Pharoahs Li'l Red Riding Hood)
Me: "Kasey, stop that or you're going back in your room." Zac: "Me?" Me: "Is your name Kasey?" Zac "No." Kasey: "My name isn't Kasey either."
Zac: "Mom, your phone is ringing" (handing it to me) "I think it's your mom." Me: "How do you know who it is?" Zac: (with complete exasperation and seriousness) "because I can read." Touche.
"I cried a little at school today, but it's okay because there was blood. It's okay to cry if you're bleeding when you're six." - Zac
"I just really don't like being nice." - Kasey (in response to me asking her why she refuses to say 'hi' to anyone.)
"Then I get to pick my nose." Kasey, after being told it was Zac's turn to pick a movie for us to watch. Win win.
"It's okay; I just pee peed on them a little bit." - Kasey, in response to being asked why her feet were wet
"Mommy, am I your baby? Can you go get your baby a pickle?" - Kasey
"Who's Carol?" - Zac, after being told the song he was listening to was called Carol of the Bells
"Mommy, even though this looks disgusting and a little bit like poop, I'm going to try it." - Zac, in regards to the pork roast we had for dinner. What a trooper.
"I don't think you really even like Jesus!" - Zac's response to Granny (...Granny has always been kind of a shady character...)
"Mommy, we need more blood to drink!" - Kasey...loudly...in the middle of Wal-Mart. (I don't know if teaching the kids about communion has been such a good idea.)
"There's too many hippopotomuses, we're never going to make it. Don't touch them either, they're on fire." - Zac, pretending in the living room
"I think Daddy exercises a lot so he can get really strong and break stuff, like cars and buses." - Zac
- Zac is afraid of ET, so Kasey keeps telling him ET is in his room and then laughing a devious little laugh.
introduced my kids to The Princess Bride tonight. Zac was brushing his teeth at bedtime and said "You killed my father. Prepare to die!" and then stabbed me with his toothbrush.
"Shake it, shake it, shake it naked now" - Zac, singing Twist and Shout on The Beatles Rockband
2009 Facebook Status Updates
had a blast at '80's karaoke night - thank you Dave & Amber!
can't believe her dad is at the game in Miami tonight
is plotting world domination...and playing some Wii games on the side
is now officially a soccer mom - terrifying.
says "learn your rules or you'll be eaten in your sleep"
is ecstatic about her brothers playing at the Viper Room next week!
got a new laptop!!! (It's pretty much the best day ever)
is excited about all of us being home tomorrow
suspects her husband is secretly wishing he could go to work and avoid this much family time :)
built a snowman in the kitchen with her kids today
thinks there is a conspiracy of rappers out to shampoo our carpet...
made up a new term - "guitarpal tunnel syndrome" - the condition one suffers after too much Guitar Hero
is amazed at the sheer volume of vomit a toddler can possess
is fast forwarding the DVR to the Superbowl commercials
thought tonight was the funniest Office ever - I can't even pick a quote - I just keep thinking of Dwight with the dummy face on
is drowning in a sea of mucous - yuck.
is wishing for the healing powers of hot and sour soup from Szechuan...mmm...
them ...must...conquer...laundry
is the very model of a modern major general
is fighting a sinus infection, a migraine and now a stomach virus...waving the white flag
is rising up like a phoenix from the ashes
had a blast at the church lingerie party...yeah, you heard that right :)
is restless and indecisive
is not boycotting Valentine's Day this year, for once
had 2 dates with 2 guys in 2 days (the 2nd one was much smaller and took me to McDonald's and Gamestop)
is eating a burrito for breakfast
is trying to summon up the energy to do something around here...
is watching Scooby Doo meets Batman "...and I would have gotten away with it if weren't for you meddling kids and your pesky dog..." (fist shaking)
is watching Romeo + Juliet...and saying all the lines with it because she's by herself and she can
is enjoying the peace and quiet - it's a rare thing
says "Bless you, Spaghetti Bettie, you've made my evening"
is "the happiest girl in the whole U.S.A...."
is hungry...(yes Matt, like the wolf)
is having a fabulous day
is ready for some pizza
is really excited about The Beatles Wii game coming out this fall
is eating chips with earbuds in - my crunching is threatening to overpower the music
caller ID just came up "telemarketer" - seriously, who's answering that call?
wants a tattoo for her 30th birthday - I need to know where to go to have it done - suggestions?
is raiding the kids' Valentine candy stash
is miserable - this cold is relentless
and her son are both home sick - we're having a Star Wars marathon
and Zac are discussing consequences and bad decisions (he always cries when Anakin turns to the Dark Side)
is watching both of her kids sleep off fevers :(
is home with both kids again - I'm waiting for Zac to burst into flames
is having Dr Seuss Day
's tip for the day - exfoliating gloves easily remove crayon from just about anything
- the girls' get together is canceled tonight due to various illnesses at my house
- Zac officially has a double ear infection and possibly strep - yea.
- rinse.repeat.
is chanting "...stay positive...stay positive...stay positive..."
is researching composting
- alright, who ate all the chocolate?
's dog is refusing to let her take a nap
is searching for a vending machine full of painkillers...
is making a bird feeder
is on day 3 of a killer migraine - enough already
thinks Mary Poppins may be one of the greatest movies ever made
thinks that "nowhere is there a more happier crew than them what sings chim chim cheree chim cheroo"
is restless...
is embarking on the 1st day of Spring Break - Mary Poppins Day :)
is staring open-mouthed at the screen in a Benadryl stupor - welcome, Allergy Season
says "Top o' the mornin' to ya" and all that jazz.
rode a camel with her kids this morning - we conquered the zoo, the aquarium, Toys 'R' Us and Chick-Fil-A...whew
's husband suprised her with tickets to Jesus Christ Superstar next month :)
is ready for some serious Mario-Karting
- 0 allergies - 1
is eating Cheetos...mmm...
opened her window and sang, but the birds and mice just don't seem to want to clean her house...
"I read the news today, oh boy..."
"...winds in the east, mist coming in, like somethin' is brewin' and 'bout to begin"
's "just sitting here watching the wheels go round n' round"
- Behold, the Tyranna-snow-us Rex.
The Tyranna-snow-us was taken down today by his mortal enemy - the sun. Our lawn is strewn with dino parts.
is home with a sick little Kasey-dilla
: I think Kasey is conducting some sort of experiment on how much disobedience I can tolerate (if so, the answer is "not much more" - but don't tell her.)
is one in a houseful of sick people - I think we're going to sit in a circle with a box of kleenex in the middle for the remainder of the day.
is watching opening night of baseball...time to work on my reading list...
is cold! Enough already.
is thinking of changing her Mafia name soon and is taking suggestions - so far I'm thinking Mamma Cass or Dom Perignon...
- Bartlesville is on fire today...and not just culturally. Seriously, where's the barbeque?
is attempting her first 1000 piece black and white jigsaw puzzle...it's mainly a gray area...
fought a tree today. - I won, but it came at a price...
is still thinking about the movie 7 Pounds a couple of days after watching it...I think I needed to hear his thought process...
Don't make me rough you up...
would like to thank her husband for taking both of his girls out on his day off :)
: Easter grass - the gift that keeps on giving...and giving...and giving...
has survived yet another holiday...just barely.
BARTLESVILLE TAX DAY TEA PARTIES: Johnstone Park @ noon & Eastland Center @ 5:00 "Restore the Republic - Revolt Against Socialism"
is battling a stomach virus alongside an even sicker Zachary
just watched Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed...
doesn't understand why people force their opinions on those around them and refuse to let their own beliefs be questioned - if they really think what they believe is the truth; shouldn't it stand up under questioning?
"and I went down to the demonstration to get my fair share of abuse..."
"Cathy, I'm lost, I said, though I knew she was sleeping. I'm empty and aching and I don't know why ..."
just did 2 hours of yard work - I will now take a handful of ibuprofen and vegetate for the remainder of the day
: vegetating turned into "planting a vegetable garden" - tomorrow I will crawl out to water it, as that will probably be the only movement I am capable of...
is watching a documentary on hippies and the LSD Revolution
is planning a dinosaur vacation for next weekend
is excited about seeing Jesus Christ Superstar tonight! :)
cannot say enough about how great the cast was for Jesus Christ Superstar. I could have watched Judas dance for hours.
"Auntie Em, Auntie Em!"
is back from vacation - I would post pics, but some kid (not mine) hit me in the face with a basketball as I was taking a picture, knocking my camera out of my hands and straight to the bottom of the pool. Hopefully my memory card survived the voyage.
thinks there should be a medical term for the recovery period after a vacation - we're all suffering from PVS (post-vacation-syndrome)
has a migraine - and there's a bird outside that seems to be unaware of that fact...and may not live much longer.
wants to thank her wonderful husband for borrowing a camera to assure her that her memory card is still intact.
wonders, "What would you do for a Klondike bar?"
- anyone in the market for a kneecap? I'd give my left one for anything that could alleviate this migraine for at least 5 minutes...
- Dammit Jim, I had a tremendous day.
just watched the Scrubs finale and laughed through my tears
has reached a new level in the hierarchy of nerdiness by recruiting the maximum number of mafia members. (I'm now one of those notorious 501's :)
"...and you read your Emily Dickinson and I, my Robert Frost and we note our place with bookmarkers that measure what we've lost..."
is planning out the summer (the only way the kids and I will survive one another.)
"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society." - Mark Twain
feels terrible...maybe it's the swine flu. Let the rumors begin...
- yet another evening of waiting out a storm in the closet...and then a breathing treatment for Zac, due to sitting in the bottom of a dusty closet.
"Please stop putting spaghetti between your toes and get your feet off the table." Add this to my list of things-I-never-expected-to-have-to-say (also on this list "Put your pants back on; we don't take our pants off at Burger King.")
needs to know how the Criminal Minds finale ended last night! (I got about 45 minutes of weather coverage and hulu will only give me a 2 minute clip.) Help!
keeps getting phonecalls from the NRA and a number listed as "political call"...some members of my mafia may also be stalking me...
is leaving for her 3rd date in 3 weeks - I'm getting spoiled.
- yesterday I told Josh that it looked like we would be needing a new garage door pretty soon. About 4 hours later, it broke. He's blaming me.
: Less than 20 minutes of pulling weeds and I'm sneezing and covered in hives. Now I remember why I'm not more "outdoorsy." Nature hates me.
just did her annual chopping/massacre of the shubbery and was rewarded with hives once again. I think nature and I came out even today.
feels like she should do something crazy on this last day of being a twenty-something...
is officially old.
Summer Fun Day 2 out of 60 is nearly complete. I thought it was fairly successful until I realized I've been compulsively updating my FB status and my kids are unenthusiastic pessimists...the beatings will continue until morale improves.
thinks every day should begin with a pirate treasure hunt...
took her kids to Fun Day at the Assembly of God Church. An hour later, Zac declared it the "worst and scariest place ever" and Daddy rescued all of us...and he hit a home run in softball last night. :)
- Kasey is currently wearing the following: Cinderella panties, nightgown, Cinderella Dress, Cinderella jacket (zipped), tiara, devil horns, 6 beaded necklaces, 2 watches, and she's carrying a scepter with a glittery star on top.
"Are you in league with the wicked old hag who sent my poor Giselle to this foul place...Arty?"
regrets that she no longer has the patience for Charles Dickens. (There warn't enough wittles about to tide me through whilst I plodded along...)
"But the reverence which is difficult, and which has personal merit in it, is the respect which you pay, without compulsion, to the political or religious attitude of a man whose beliefs are not yours." - Mark Twain (Following the Equator)
is being sucked into Twitter after a vicious struggle against it...
is addicted to Twitter (as I inevitably knew I would be.) Alex Stanley has an account as well...looking forward to this little experiment.
put honey on a piece of toast, where it dripped to the couch...and a blanket...and my shirt...and my jeans...and my socks...and finally down my entire arm, at which point I looked up and realized all the places I had been dripping. Sticky. Yuck.
Jumbo corndog? Check. Roasted corn? Check. Dippin' Dots? Check. Sunburned nose? Check. All in all, another successful year at Sunfest.
"All the Federales say, "Could'a had him any day" They only let him slip away out of kindness, I suppose..."
is listening to some new Taddy Porter songs
ate a cheeseburger, nearly killed a pedestrian, played at the park and flew a kite...all before noon...I need a nap.
was hoping Detroit would bring the Cup back again last night, but I'd rather see them win it at home anyway...don't fail me now, Henrik Zetterberg...and I also hope Jordan Staal gets at least an elbow or two in the process.
"I do believe in fairies. I do. I do." ...thanks a lot, guys.
just saw an ad on FB that promises "the ability to perform miracles" after attending "holistic sessions." - frightening.
is listening to the hellacious thunderstorm I've been waiting on.
- last night I cooked a huge ham and for the first time, I could picture the giant pig it used to be attached to. (I kept thinking of Phoebe on Friends - food with a face!) It didn't make it any less delicious, but I experienced a rare moment of horror.
is mourning Detroit's loss of the Stanley Cup...oh, Ozzy...what a series.
just ran a mile...okay, half ran/half walked a mile...until she saw stars and started wheezing and nearly vomited on the awesome Bruins astroturf (have you seen that field?!) Time to step up plan get-back-in-shape.
is spending the evening with mashed potatoes, beer and a Seven Nation Army.
"...We will sing, sing, sing, and make music with the heavens We will sing, sing, sing, grateful that you hear us..." - I think this song is impossible to sing without dancing. No, seriously.
Running, Day 3. I can now make it halfway before my body starts screaming. In other news, I ran out of shaving cream, thus forcing me to use Suave Kids 2-in-1 Cowabunga Coconut shampoo and body wash. Not bad.
spent 7 hours cleaning her grandparents house and then ran the daily mile...I may not be able to move tomorrow.
did 5 solid hours of shrubbery conquering madness at her grandparents' house. - It was a fair fight overall, and I'm not without battle wounds, but I think I won...unless I have poison ivy...I would consider that a draw.
wonders why people I don't know want to follow me on Twitter...stalkers.
is trying to summon the energy to clean her house for her sassy girl's 3rd birthday party tomorrow.
had an awful day. Pity party to follow...
"Abba Father, my defender, You are holy and I surrender, For in my weakness You protect me, and when my heart strays, You correct me. I cry Abba Father, I love you, Daddy..."
"mini buffalo ranch chicken sandwich" [insert motions here]
- everyone at our house now has a summer cold - it's definitely a movie day...with a lot of juice and Kleenex :)
Michael Jackson just died. Wow.
tried to find a clear shot of me in my red "Beat It" jacket and glove to post, but alas, I could not (there was a strange shot of me wearing it over a sundress with motorcycle boots and a helmet, though - I think it was my 7th birthday.)
is wondering how she can spend the next 2 weeks without Michael Westen...
made a visit to Narnia this afternoon...
may be experiencing a 1/3 life crisis...
is letting her kids jump on their beds to their hearts' content (moved their mattresses into the living room.) Someone remind them of this some day when they accuse me of not being awesome.
"I like 'em chunky."
"...Should I tell them that I am a perfect example of all You can do with a life? What should I say to them, what if I'm failing them? What should I tell them tonight?..."
had a great time with family, friends and fireworks tonight. - I also heard Josh give an audible sigh of relief when I told the kids we would talk about what Independence Day really means some other time.
thinks "jinkies," Velma should really have invested in contacts - she loses those glasses at some point in every episode of Scooby Doo.
is contemplating selling her daughter to the circus.
's daughter peed in the toilet and then put her head in it. On purpose. Repeatedly. [speechless]
- tried to explain that music lyrics are not always to be taken literally...Zac is very bothered by this and wants to know "who" is being sung to - he does not like Joe Cocker thinking he is beautiful.
watched the Harper's Island finale tonight. Am I glad I faithfully watched every episode?....hmmm...maybe?
- There's nothing like a vomiting child to start your day out right.
now owns a real cellphone...and is in the process of creating her very own Taddy Porter ringtone.
"Due to buget constraints, the light at the end of the tunnel will be turned off until further notice."
spent the afternoon at the Coffeyville waterpark (where Kasey got naked) and ended the evening at Kiddie Park. I don't know which of us is the most tired.
is wondering who wants to pay for me to see Paul McCartney in Tulsa next month?...
is contemplating the best way to turn Zac's room into the "Zac Cave" (for all his confidential/secret identity endeavours)
- Zac Cave progress: 75% complete
"If something seems too good to be true, you should shoot it, just in case."
"Come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination..."
made grilled zucchini, pickled zucchini and zucchini bread...next week I may hate zucchini.
is researching Purim...
- almost done with my Purim project...and my Esther homework, for that matter. I feel amazingly productive.
- I believe I officially like the zoo more than my kids; I think they took me there today. There was a lot of "Mom, are you done? Are you happy? Can we look at something else and then go home?"
would like to thank her husband for tilling the backyard last night. Project Garden is officially underway.
is ready to play in the dirt...and a little too excited about building pea trellises.
- pea trellises on hold. Zac's in the ER getting a better breathing treatment, Kasey's playing house with Batman and Princess Jasmine and I'm baking cookies.
Pea trellises done. Lots of vegetables planted and watered. Task for the day: organizing the kids' closets, while keeping the superhero with pneumonia and bronchitis from running - not nearly as easy as it sounds. Lego Batman, you're my only hope...
- I stepped outside for a couple of minutes, got approximately 12 mosquito bites and the largest grasshopper in North America flung itself from the bushes at me. It was all I could do not to execute the Ace Ventura 2 "They're in my hair!" maneuver.
- keeping tabs on my brothers through the latest issue of The Current - recap of DFest and their latest gig at the Cain's...both of which I missed. :(
is cancelling our first date night in nearly half a century and spending the evening with a migraine instead. Curse the Fates...
It's alive!...peas and lettuces are sprouting. :)
- gardening, massive sand castle at the lake, swimming, tiny tan lines on my little ones, glass of wine and The Rocky Horror Picture show...my day in a nutshell :)
watched parents videotaping their kids walking from the car to their classrooms (which reminded me that I forgot to take a picture of the first day yet again - I'll do it afterward...again) and thought about a discussion on glorifying mediocrity I heard recently.
is a murderer...I wanted to pull out the pumpkin vines that had pretty well run their course, but they were all hooked together, so I no longer have pumpkins in the little garden. Major gardening FAIL. It's a good thing I have more sprouting in the new garden.
is really excited about watching Ian Kinsler play some ball tonight!
"Your name is Ian!" - my favorite attempt at heckling Kinsler from the Drillers crowd tonight
just discovered a roll of toilet paper under Kasey's bed.
is home alone, watching the storm roll in - awesome.
who opened the door and let Fall in? I'm cleaning with all the windows open and it's cold!
is being consumed by consumerism and determined to stop it...Kristin, I told you reading that book was a bad idea for me :) - I've barely started it and I want to build a cabin in the woods.
"That's real rain out there gentlemen. We'll be safe for now--thank goodness we're in a bowling alley--but if George here doesn't get his dinner, any one of us could be next. "
is having a very odd week. In other news, Date Night is out to get me.
just made laundry soap and dishwashing detergent. It felt like Fight Club mixed with a visit to Silver Dollar City. Tyler Durden, meet Minnie Pearl.
is trying to avoid negativity at all costs today...it's getting pretty expensive.
is hoping dinner will somehow manifest itself tonight. I should probably have a backup plan just in case...
sweat (sweated, swat?...) completely through an entire set of clothes before 9:30 this morning (Kasey told me I smelled like our dog) humidity in full effect.
feels like Cinderella before the ball, the "trying to get everything cleaned and taken care of so she can get herself ready" part (though Cinderella didn't have to pack for 2 kids...) Thanks again to my mysterious benefactor - I owe you big time. :)
is celebrating her 7th wedding anniversary today :)
accidentally bleached yet another shirt, (stupid, stupid, stupid...) had a fantastic lunch, and is currently trying to make up time after being gone all morning.
- computer crashed, library is packed, kicked Josh away from his computer at work. Pathetic desperation.
is forever grateful to Jenny for the use of her computer...and lunch...and a Coke (it really does bring harmony to the world.)
planning and plotting and planning some more.
made homeade tortillas yesterday. Today I'm attempting Challah bread.
- FWC Amazing Racers, you better start working out now!
- Once again: FWC Amazing Racers, you've only got a couple of weeks to whip yourselves into shape. Don't say I didn't warn you. ;)
a guy eerily similiar to George Harrison was walking across the crosswalk earlier (the irony not lost on me, mind you) reminding me that The Beatles Rockband comes out tomorrow.
- overcoming the glint of commercialism...and the girl in electronics that said "What's it called? Beatles Rockband? And it comes out today?" (!) Now enjoying this fabulously rainy day, alone, in total silence, in my DC Comics PJs with a great lunch on the horizon. Life doesn't get much better than this.
- The Beatles Rockband game is now in my possession (just the game - drums are on my Christmas list.) It came after a day-long journey with a cast of characters worthy of Lewis Carroll, and included a tiny Asian woman loudly belting out "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road," an unkempt homeless man, a fat kid wiping his face on shirts for sale and a "special" employee who sang all the Beatles song titles to me as he read them.
- So, yesterday, as I'm drooling over the various Beatles displays, some guy asks what's with the all the Beatles stuff. I tell him and he says "No offense, but the Beatles were my generation; you're just a kid." Luckily he said "No offense" first, otherwise I might have killed him on the spot. (I did watch several episodes of Dexter yesterday, after all.) FYI: kid or not, The Beatles Rockband is AMAZING.
- making bread and cookies and hoping the other half of my 2-man-band isn't too sick to play tonight.
is still searching for the ever elusive perfect peanut butter cookie recipe...
has a lot of ambition, but lacks follow-through. - I did get a 78% on I Saw Her Standing There on the hard level on bass, so I guess that's something. That orange button is my enemy...
- my husband took me on a date to look at all the Halloween departments in town. He knows me all too well. :)
is planning Zac's birthday party, a garage sale, the Amazing Race and an all-out blood, guts and gore Halloween party. Whew.
- Ms. Stanley, to what do I owe this...pleasure? Zombie planning, sarcasm abounds and cheesecake for breakfast.
- Congratulations to my brothers/Taddy Porter for officially getting signed to a record deal! :)
- Happy 6th birthday to my favorite superhero, Zachary.
wants the back of my hair chopped off (it's becoming too frighteningly mullet-ish for my taste) - anyone want to volunteer?
is ready for the FWC Amazing Race - as you had better be...
It was a dark and stormy...afternoon. And now it's hailing on my patio.
- thanks Renana & Jen for saving me from hanging out with Beth Moore alone tonight. Next week will be better. :)
cannot sing like Ringo Starr - the game views this as a bad thing. Agree to disagree.
- at Kasey's MDO this morning, there were pictures of all the kids on the bulletin board, with a little bubble to the side, like they were telling what they want to be when they grow up. In the midst of the smiling 'I want to be a fireman' crowd, is Kasey, bent over and screaming "I don't know!" at the top of her lungs. Lord help us.
- Kasey's teacher wanted to discuss her "behavior" today. First Mother's Day Out, then on to a life of delinquency and crime...or she'll just turn out like me. Either way, it's frightening.
- Kasey saw Zac peeing on the tree in the backyard last night and tried to outdo him (yep, for real - poop.) She then sent her brother inside for toilet paper, which HE DID! When people ask why we're only having 2 children, let this story be my answer...did I mention the dog ate the poop?
Wow. I've never burned a batch of Sculpey quite like this one. Luckily, I was making "flesh" for Halloween. - It will now be "seared flesh."
- Taddy Porter is officially allowed to represent.
"There's a bird that nests inside you, sleeping underneath your skin. When you open up your wings to speak, I wish you'd let me in..." - love, love, love this line
is hoping her neighbors don't call the cops after watching her lug Chokin' Charlie all over the yard. Proper corpse placement is a must.
has Electricity pumping through her veins. No, really. - Hopefully it will revive me, because right now all I want to do is curl up in a ball and sleep...and cough...and sneeze...and hack like an old smoker...ugh.
- dialogue tonight between my dad and my son, who was afraid to watch The Wizard of Oz, yelling from 2 separate rooms - Dad: "It's got midgets!" Zac: "I don't like witches!" Dad: "Not witches, midgets!!!" If that's not a selling point, I don't know what is.
watched the peaceful sunrise this morning, while violently hacking like an old smoker.
is ready for a little Dave Ramsey insight.
should be doing Beth Moore homework instead of playing Mafia Wars. New plan: bake cookies, finish homework...then play Mafia Wars.
is tired of coughing. Seriously. Enough is enough.
just discovered that my "bowl o' fog" no longer produces fog. What a sad day in Mudville. Oh, well. On to Plan B.
absolutely loved the message tonight. Thanks for sharing the mysterious chips with me, Renana.
just picked peas and bellpeppers by flashlight, in my PJs. I love my garden.
just hauled out just about every pillow and blanket (and stuffed animal) we have and is preparing to spend the rest of the day watching movies, cuddled up with Kasey.
picked Zac up early after grocery shopping (aka, buying bags full of what ended up as cardboard mush) so as not to have to get the ark...I mean, the car, back out there again.
will officially be selling Avon tomorrow. ***Sending out the buy-from-me-buy-from-me-buy-from-me...*** subliminal messages. Please heed them.
- My son drew me a picture of the Beatles (complete with instruments and names), proclaimed himself "George Parisom" and is currently singing "Here Comes the Sun" at the top of his lungs. Wow.
- going to hang out with my brothers. :)
- did we skip Fall and go directly into Winter again?
needs atypical Halloween song playlist suggestions (ie: do NOT suggest Thriller)
- I've been trying to convince my body that it really isn't sick...now that I have a fever to go along with the symptoms I've been denying, I must admit defeat.
- some girl just went rummaging through the leftover yard sale in my driveway, then yelled to be let inside. After being denied entry, she yelled "Steve's in there, right?" Evidently, she had Steve on the phone, because everyone in Southport got to hear what a "mofo" Steve was on her way back to the car. Josh is never allowed to leave the house again. I have a feeling Steve's in pretty big trouble as well.
- I just scared myself with one of my own Halloween props (I actually screamed out loud.) I'll count that as a success. In other news, I accidentally dyed my hands green.
...must...summon...energy...I have a million things to do today and I don't want to do any of them. I'm so tired, I don't even want to make severed body parts. It's a new low for me.
I'm going to have a nervous breakdown before the day is over
spent the afternoon organizing a cemetery full of zombies, only to see there is a 100% chance of rain.
is in full-scale, super-scary party-planning mode. - I was also asked if I wanted to buy "some effin vodka" and then led to honest-to-goodness Effin Vodka. Sadly, I declined.
exhibited rare patience only a mother could muster, when, after waiting more than 2 hours with Zac at the doctor's office, and listening to him chatter nonstop, he turned to me and said "I can count to 100." He wasn't bluffing.
has a huge coldsore, spent nearly all day at the doctor's office, and is now running a fever. - I so do not have time for this.
horrid smell in the kitchen = dead mouse behind the refrigerator
Thank you to everyone who came to our Halloween party - it was better than I ever anticipated. I never expected to hear 20+ people singing "Livin' on a Prayer and Eye of the Tiger" at the top of their lungs in my living room. "Strum...strum, strum, strum."
just picked a handful of vegetables out of the garden, washed them, threw them in a pan and then ate them over rice. - Free food is somehow made a million times better when you grow it yourself. I heart my garden.
my son is wearing a cape, carrying an enormous tree limb across the backyard over his head in both hands, and laughing his "evil" laugh.
can't figure out why everyone who lands on a deserted island keeps trying to find a way off of it. - I'm looking for an island to get stuck on.
"It had been a wonderful evening and what I needed now, to give it the perfect ending, was a little of the Ludwig Van." Feeling restless and trapped by the 4 walls of the 'Ville. I blame Guy Fawkes.
- this drinking binge is brought to you in part by everyone who failed to drink more at my Halloween party...oh, how I wish you had all had more to drink...
The Wii Fit said told me I'd "put on a little weight" since yesterday, as though implying I were some sort of elephant and then asked me why this might be so. When I answered "I don't know" (being unhappy with their choices it gave me) it said "Are you SURE you don't know?" like I was lying. I'm thinking about breaking up with it. It's a little too nosy if you ask me...wait...is it listening to me right now?
- watching the documentary "How the Beatles Rocked the Kremlin" and I'm amazed at the lengths Russian teenagers went to illegally obtain rock and roll behind the Iron Curtain(they recorded it from Radio Luxembourg and cut it onto used X-rays.)
has a migraine that's causing her to invision putting Dora the Explorer in a choke hold.
went seriously old school and made a Christmas playlist that includes Christmas in Dixie, Pretty Paper and Marshmallow World, just to name a few winners.
nearly passed out from hula hooping. Seriously.
"This medicine is going to make him very jittery and anxious and he's probably going to be very disobedient and hard to control. Give it to him twice each day. Have a nice day!" - pharmacist "consult"
is tired of FB telling me who I haven't talked to in a while and who became friends and whatnot. - What are you, the conversation police?
Okay, I give up. I'm getting ready to pull my real garden for the winter, so I'll play some Farmville. Be my neighbor. Send me cows and chickens and whatnot.
- My house. Tonight. 6:00. Chocolate Pampered Chef Party. Be there.
is ill - and not in a hip, Beastie Boys way.
is building an army...of white blood cells. "There's also more bad news; there's been another murder (in Savannah.)"
- Day 2 of my involuntary bed-in. I hate being sick.
has moved from the bed to the couch. It's a minor improvement, but an improvement nonetheless.
spent the last 2 days dumping together every single toy her children own and went through them all one by one. We bagged together roughly 8 trash bags of toys (seriously) to give away in Christmas toy programs. It was like Santa came in reverse.
It's time for pie. "Gimme some pie!"
The tree is up. I had some pumpkin pie, followed by some chocolate cream pie and I'm saving the Marie Callendar Razzleberry pie for after my nap. Now to ask about that nap...
I've been trying to convince Zac that just because the calendar changes to the next month, it doesn't directly affect the weather. So far, I just look like an idiot.
can't say anything nice, so...well, you know.
is trying to turn that frown upside down...and to stop using awful phrases like that one.
is looking for her ear mittens to brave the parade.
may never be warm again.
is ready to board up the house and prepare for winter Jack Torrence style...minus the ax murdering part.
Joseph and at least 2 of the wise men are currently rockin' the pink Little People mini van at our house. I couldn't tell if Jesus and Mary were inside or not. They may still be in the Barbie Jeep.
- Josh just spent the last 10 minutes tracking down a smell he thought was pee, only to discover it was my new peach lipgloss.
- I just explained live TV to Zac and told him it used to be like that all the time. He looked at me in total confusion, as if I were some sort of caveman speaking gibberish.
just watched her son perform as a rapping reindeer. Simultaneously hilarious and precious, I must say.
"Well, I've never been to Heaven, but I've been to Oklahoma..."
is playing with the toys she let her kids open tonight and wondering if either child realizes how hard she had to try not to let them open them all.
- Listen for Taddy Porter singing "Shake Me" this week on Monday Night football!
is so excited to get a new sister-in-law for Christmas.
- don't forget: Taddy Porter's "Shake Me" will be on Monday Night Football tonight :)
- Why am I just now finding out the OKC Blazers no longer exist? No more "...and they still suck!" It's a sad day.
hopes Zac's new snow bibs get here before the snow does...we may have some serious snow sculpting to do this year.
is spending the night on Circle Mountain, watching the snow pour in.
is home, thanks to my parents, who let us steal their car for the night.
just successfully assembled the entire Barbie Pink Playset, including proper exact placement of all 51 decals. - I have also concluded that the Nerf shotgun with auto shell eject may be the coolest toy ever made.
is preparing to put her house back in some sort of order. It looks like Santa's bag of toys exploded in here.
is in the continual conquest of laundry and dishes and is also playing a little Donkey Kong, before moving on to the Play-doh spaghetti factory and burger builder and then settling in with her Reservoir Dogs jigsaw puzzle in front of the fire. - It's a pretty busy schedule.
just heard Taddy Porter on the entire intro to Monday Night Football! Sweet!
- what is with the snow sneak attack? One minute, I'm wondering when it will start snowing, the next, the ground is covered again. I was hoping to construct a large snow hippopotomus, but it doesn't look like I'm going to get enough building material.
- last night I dreamed I was quitting school to live in a cave made of animal skins and a huge alligator snake attacked me as I was leaving the building. Some woman there kept telling me just to walk it off.
is SO excited about the new camera she just got to go with her new Kodak printer. The kids have no idea what they're in for tomorrow...
- Kasey just gave Zac a crayon and said "Eat this, you'll feel better"
- Zac asked me to tell him "every bad word there is" so he knows which ones he shouldn't say.
- Kasey's playing with pretend lizards in a dollhouse - she just told me they're eating manicotti and strawberries upstairs"
- "Please speak more loudly, my ears are turned off because they're sick" - Zac
"...down came the rain and watched the spider bounce..." - Kasey, singing Itsy Bitsy Spider
"darn it, I'm thirsty - get me some chocolate milk and a pickle!" - Kasey
"If you don't wear green tomorrow, everybody's gonna punch you." - Zac
"Daddy, don't call Mommy sweetheart; it makes me wanna throw up." - Zac
"...but Mom, how do you KNOW you're always right about everything?" - Zac
- "Well, I'm a really cute man." - Zac's response to me telling him he has a lot of friends.
- "Mommy, you look beautiful... like Catwoman." - Zac
"Why does Dora carry around all that stuff she doesn't need in her backpack? It's not very smart." - Zac's observations on Dora the Explorer
-"boogers are dirty but they're yummy too" - Kasey
- "Don't comb my hair; it hurts my feelings." - Kasey
"No Mommy, you're not beautiful yet." - Kasey's response to "Are we ready to go?"
- "Why does my cheeseburger have freckles?" - Zac, pondering the sesame seed bun at dinner
"Dear Jesus, please help our food not taste gross..." - Zac's prayer intro at dinner
"Boys don't like sharks because they're too scary. I love sharks." - Kasey (avid fan of sharks, dinosaurs and most other "scary" animals)
"Okay, tummy, I'm not going to give you anymore food if you're just going to keep hurting." - Zac
"I got a 'gina" - Kasey (repeated as a song, 30-40 times, while dancing naked in circles) next up...a talk about appropriateness and modesty...
"I just want to wear my feet today." - Kasey
"Knives aren't for fighting. They're for cutting hotdogs and opening presents." - Kasey
"Go out in the hall and my mommy will run as fast as she can to come and protect me." - Zac's response to "What should you do if you hear the tornado sirens?"
"I'm a really long awaker. I don't like to sleep ever." - Zac
"Can I just be naked in the car?" - Kasey
"I've been cracking myself up all day because I'm amazingly hilarious." - Zac
"A moosest? A gooster? A hippolo?" - 3 of Kasey's guesses for "a buffalo"
"Will you read this to me?" (whispering really quietly) "Say 'yes." - Kasey
"Sometimes when I smile, I really look like a bad guy." - Zac
"Mom, my pirate hook keeps getting stuck." "On what?" (screaming from Kasey) "On Kasey."
"Why do the Beatles want to hold my hand?" - Zac
"Mom, could you just wear that shirt at home and not to pick me up? Just wear a regular shirt next time and not something weird." -Zac (note to self: tank tops = unacceptable for mom)
"Daddy, did you pick Mommy because she was a good lookin' momma?" -Zac
"I really like school now. I didn't at first." - Zac...the day before the last day of school
"I wonder what the girl's favorite color is?" "What girl?" "The girl I'm going to marry." - Zac (my long term planner)
"I can't. There's a dinosaur in there and he might eat me." - Kasey's response when asked to take a toy to her room (it was hard to argue with and we have since rid the room of said dinosaur.)
"Mommy, I think you're just making this stuff up." - Zac, on my list of things astronauts eat (I backed up my expertise with pics of me at NASA)
"Now you look beautiful!" - Kasey, after putting a glittery princess tiara on our dog...who just sat there and looked humiliated.
"I love my daddy. Him's so cute." - Kasey
- Kasey just picked one of my socks up off the floor, licked it, made a weird face and said "This isn't Daddy's."
"When I'm a grown-up and I've got a lady, I'm taking a shower with her." - Zac
"I finished writing my book. Can you take me to the library so I can put it on the shelf and people can start checking it out?" - Zac (writer extraordinaire)
"Why did the hospital give us this girl?" - Zac, in reference to his sister
"Kasey, can you just leave me alone and let me relax for a while?" - Zac
"I don't wanna be a lady; I wanna be a dinosaur." - Kasey
" I'm not pretendin' - I'm for real-in' " - Kasey
"I think this fruit is a little too spicy for me." - Zac
"Zachary's not being polite to me!" - Kasey
"I can't see Jesus; the sky's in the way." - Zac
"Kasey, something magical happened...last night, you were sleeping, and suddenly...you became three!" - Zac (drama king and fan of all things magical)
"Mommy, I think we're having a grown-up conversation right now. I like it. We should talk like grown-ups more." - Zac
"Hey, Mom, trade me controllers; my hands are really sweaty." - Zac
"Do fairies poop?" - Zac (this should be noted in the general "Does that poop?" file, which is quite extensive and covers everything from animals to Jedi.)
"Mommy, I'm sorry we were acting like wild animals." - Zac
"Next time just say 'yes' and don't say a weird word that I don't know about." - Zac (after I explained what "indeed" meant, which I used in response to a question of his)
"Remember that gross kind of pop that tasted really yucky that Daddy got me last time when I was sick? Can I have some of that?" - Zac (willing to try anything to settle his stomach this morning - he's much better now)
"I hate eating; it just makes me have to poop...It's not funny, Mommy. I really hate pooping." -Zac
"That bad guy looks like Frank Phillips." - Zac (referring to Slugworth on Willy Wonka - he was also disappointed that Charlie didn't immediately kill Slugworth when he met him in the alley...what am I teaching this kid?)
"Mommy, doesn't the wind feel great? That's why I took off my pants." - Zac
"Stop it, Mommy, you're about to scrub my ears off!" - Kasey
answered some "where babies come from" questions this afternoon and when I asked Zac what differences he noticed about boys and girls, he said "Guys work out a lot and girls cook dinner."
- not only is Kasey referring to herself in 3rd person today, she has declared herself "the puppy," thus, "the puppy wants a snack"
"My jeans are choking me." - Kasey
"Zachary said he's going to destroy me." -Kasey
Kasey: "Zachary farted on me" Zac: "Not on purpose!"
"When people ask who drew that, tell them Zachary did. Zachary Ennis; he's my son and he lives here and he draws really scary stuff. But don't show them this one; they might get too disgusted." - Zachary Ennis...my son, who lives here...
"Darn it, I think I need to shave" - Kasey, rubbing her leg (I just had a glimpse of her at about 15...frightening)
Zac: "Did the wolf get to hold Little Red Riding Hood?" Me: "I don't think so" Zac: "Good. She must have listened to her mom." (listening to Sam Sham & the Pharoahs Li'l Red Riding Hood)
Me: "Kasey, stop that or you're going back in your room." Zac: "Me?" Me: "Is your name Kasey?" Zac "No." Kasey: "My name isn't Kasey either."
Zac: "Mom, your phone is ringing" (handing it to me) "I think it's your mom." Me: "How do you know who it is?" Zac: (with complete exasperation and seriousness) "because I can read." Touche.
"I cried a little at school today, but it's okay because there was blood. It's okay to cry if you're bleeding when you're six." - Zac
"I just really don't like being nice." - Kasey (in response to me asking her why she refuses to say 'hi' to anyone.)
"Then I get to pick my nose." Kasey, after being told it was Zac's turn to pick a movie for us to watch. Win win.
"It's okay; I just pee peed on them a little bit." - Kasey, in response to being asked why her feet were wet
"Mommy, am I your baby? Can you go get your baby a pickle?" - Kasey
"Who's Carol?" - Zac, after being told the song he was listening to was called Carol of the Bells
"Mommy, even though this looks disgusting and a little bit like poop, I'm going to try it." - Zac, in regards to the pork roast we had for dinner. What a trooper.
"I don't think you really even like Jesus!" - Zac's response to Granny (...Granny has always been kind of a shady character...)
"Mommy, we need more blood to drink!" - Kasey...loudly...in the middle of Wal-Mart. (I don't know if teaching the kids about communion has been such a good idea.)
"There's too many hippopotomuses, we're never going to make it. Don't touch them either, they're on fire." - Zac, pretending in the living room
"I think Daddy exercises a lot so he can get really strong and break stuff, like cars and buses." - Zac
- Zac is afraid of ET, so Kasey keeps telling him ET is in his room and then laughing a devious little laugh.
introduced my kids to The Princess Bride tonight. Zac was brushing his teeth at bedtime and said "You killed my father. Prepare to die!" and then stabbed me with his toothbrush.
"Shake it, shake it, shake it naked now" - Zac, singing Twist and Shout on The Beatles Rockband
2009 Facebook Status Updates
had a blast at '80's karaoke night - thank you Dave & Amber!
can't believe her dad is at the game in Miami tonight
is plotting world domination...and playing some Wii games on the side
is now officially a soccer mom - terrifying.
says "learn your rules or you'll be eaten in your sleep"
is ecstatic about her brothers playing at the Viper Room next week!
got a new laptop!!! (It's pretty much the best day ever)
is excited about all of us being home tomorrow
suspects her husband is secretly wishing he could go to work and avoid this much family time :)
built a snowman in the kitchen with her kids today
thinks there is a conspiracy of rappers out to shampoo our carpet...
made up a new term - "guitarpal tunnel syndrome" - the condition one suffers after too much Guitar Hero
is amazed at the sheer volume of vomit a toddler can possess
is fast forwarding the DVR to the Superbowl commercials
thought tonight was the funniest Office ever - I can't even pick a quote - I just keep thinking of Dwight with the dummy face on
is drowning in a sea of mucous - yuck.
is wishing for the healing powers of hot and sour soup from Szechuan...mmm...
them ...must...conquer...laundry
is the very model of a modern major general
is fighting a sinus infection, a migraine and now a stomach virus...waving the white flag
is rising up like a phoenix from the ashes
had a blast at the church lingerie party...yeah, you heard that right :)
is restless and indecisive
is not boycotting Valentine's Day this year, for once
had 2 dates with 2 guys in 2 days (the 2nd one was much smaller and took me to McDonald's and Gamestop)
is eating a burrito for breakfast
is trying to summon up the energy to do something around here...
is watching Scooby Doo meets Batman "...and I would have gotten away with it if weren't for you meddling kids and your pesky dog..." (fist shaking)
is watching Romeo + Juliet...and saying all the lines with it because she's by herself and she can
is enjoying the peace and quiet - it's a rare thing
says "Bless you, Spaghetti Bettie, you've made my evening"
is "the happiest girl in the whole U.S.A...."
is hungry...(yes Matt, like the wolf)
is having a fabulous day
is ready for some pizza
is really excited about The Beatles Wii game coming out this fall
is eating chips with earbuds in - my crunching is threatening to overpower the music
caller ID just came up "telemarketer" - seriously, who's answering that call?
wants a tattoo for her 30th birthday - I need to know where to go to have it done - suggestions?
is raiding the kids' Valentine candy stash
is miserable - this cold is relentless
and her son are both home sick - we're having a Star Wars marathon
and Zac are discussing consequences and bad decisions (he always cries when Anakin turns to the Dark Side)
is watching both of her kids sleep off fevers :(
is home with both kids again - I'm waiting for Zac to burst into flames
is having Dr Seuss Day
's tip for the day - exfoliating gloves easily remove crayon from just about anything
- the girls' get together is canceled tonight due to various illnesses at my house
- Zac officially has a double ear infection and possibly strep - yea.
- rinse.repeat.
is chanting "...stay positive...stay positive...stay positive..."
is researching composting
- alright, who ate all the chocolate?
's dog is refusing to let her take a nap
is searching for a vending machine full of painkillers...
is making a bird feeder
is on day 3 of a killer migraine - enough already
thinks Mary Poppins may be one of the greatest movies ever made
thinks that "nowhere is there a more happier crew than them what sings chim chim cheree chim cheroo"
is restless...
is embarking on the 1st day of Spring Break - Mary Poppins Day :)
is staring open-mouthed at the screen in a Benadryl stupor - welcome, Allergy Season
says "Top o' the mornin' to ya" and all that jazz.
rode a camel with her kids this morning - we conquered the zoo, the aquarium, Toys 'R' Us and Chick-Fil-A...whew
's husband suprised her with tickets to Jesus Christ Superstar next month :)
is ready for some serious Mario-Karting
- 0 allergies - 1
is eating Cheetos...mmm...
opened her window and sang, but the birds and mice just don't seem to want to clean her house...
"I read the news today, oh boy..."
"...winds in the east, mist coming in, like somethin' is brewin' and 'bout to begin"
's "just sitting here watching the wheels go round n' round"
- Behold, the Tyranna-snow-us Rex.
The Tyranna-snow-us was taken down today by his mortal enemy - the sun. Our lawn is strewn with dino parts.
is home with a sick little Kasey-dilla
: I think Kasey is conducting some sort of experiment on how much disobedience I can tolerate (if so, the answer is "not much more" - but don't tell her.)
is one in a houseful of sick people - I think we're going to sit in a circle with a box of kleenex in the middle for the remainder of the day.
is watching opening night of baseball...time to work on my reading list...
is cold! Enough already.
is thinking of changing her Mafia name soon and is taking suggestions - so far I'm thinking Mamma Cass or Dom Perignon...
- Bartlesville is on fire today...and not just culturally. Seriously, where's the barbeque?
is attempting her first 1000 piece black and white jigsaw puzzle...it's mainly a gray area...
fought a tree today. - I won, but it came at a price...
is still thinking about the movie 7 Pounds a couple of days after watching it...I think I needed to hear his thought process...
Don't make me rough you up...
would like to thank her husband for taking both of his girls out on his day off :)
: Easter grass - the gift that keeps on giving...and giving...and giving...
has survived yet another holiday...just barely.
BARTLESVILLE TAX DAY TEA PARTIES: Johnstone Park @ noon & Eastland Center @ 5:00 "Restore the Republic - Revolt Against Socialism"
is battling a stomach virus alongside an even sicker Zachary
just watched Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed...
doesn't understand why people force their opinions on those around them and refuse to let their own beliefs be questioned - if they really think what they believe is the truth; shouldn't it stand up under questioning?
"and I went down to the demonstration to get my fair share of abuse..."
"Cathy, I'm lost, I said, though I knew she was sleeping. I'm empty and aching and I don't know why ..."
just did 2 hours of yard work - I will now take a handful of ibuprofen and vegetate for the remainder of the day
: vegetating turned into "planting a vegetable garden" - tomorrow I will crawl out to water it, as that will probably be the only movement I am capable of...
is watching a documentary on hippies and the LSD Revolution
is planning a dinosaur vacation for next weekend
is excited about seeing Jesus Christ Superstar tonight! :)
cannot say enough about how great the cast was for Jesus Christ Superstar. I could have watched Judas dance for hours.
"Auntie Em, Auntie Em!"
is back from vacation - I would post pics, but some kid (not mine) hit me in the face with a basketball as I was taking a picture, knocking my camera out of my hands and straight to the bottom of the pool. Hopefully my memory card survived the voyage.
thinks there should be a medical term for the recovery period after a vacation - we're all suffering from PVS (post-vacation-syndrome)
has a migraine - and there's a bird outside that seems to be unaware of that fact...and may not live much longer.
wants to thank her wonderful husband for borrowing a camera to assure her that her memory card is still intact.
wonders, "What would you do for a Klondike bar?"
- anyone in the market for a kneecap? I'd give my left one for anything that could alleviate this migraine for at least 5 minutes...
- Dammit Jim, I had a tremendous day.
just watched the Scrubs finale and laughed through my tears
has reached a new level in the hierarchy of nerdiness by recruiting the maximum number of mafia members. (I'm now one of those notorious 501's :)
"...and you read your Emily Dickinson and I, my Robert Frost and we note our place with bookmarkers that measure what we've lost..."
is planning out the summer (the only way the kids and I will survive one another.)
"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society." - Mark Twain
feels terrible...maybe it's the swine flu. Let the rumors begin...
- yet another evening of waiting out a storm in the closet...and then a breathing treatment for Zac, due to sitting in the bottom of a dusty closet.
"Please stop putting spaghetti between your toes and get your feet off the table." Add this to my list of things-I-never-expected-to-have-to-say (also on this list "Put your pants back on; we don't take our pants off at Burger King.")
needs to know how the Criminal Minds finale ended last night! (I got about 45 minutes of weather coverage and hulu will only give me a 2 minute clip.) Help!
keeps getting phonecalls from the NRA and a number listed as "political call"...some members of my mafia may also be stalking me...
is leaving for her 3rd date in 3 weeks - I'm getting spoiled.
- yesterday I told Josh that it looked like we would be needing a new garage door pretty soon. About 4 hours later, it broke. He's blaming me.
: Less than 20 minutes of pulling weeds and I'm sneezing and covered in hives. Now I remember why I'm not more "outdoorsy." Nature hates me.
just did her annual chopping/massacre of the shubbery and was rewarded with hives once again. I think nature and I came out even today.
feels like she should do something crazy on this last day of being a twenty-something...
is officially old.
Summer Fun Day 2 out of 60 is nearly complete. I thought it was fairly successful until I realized I've been compulsively updating my FB status and my kids are unenthusiastic pessimists...the beatings will continue until morale improves.
thinks every day should begin with a pirate treasure hunt...
took her kids to Fun Day at the Assembly of God Church. An hour later, Zac declared it the "worst and scariest place ever" and Daddy rescued all of us...and he hit a home run in softball last night. :)
- Kasey is currently wearing the following: Cinderella panties, nightgown, Cinderella Dress, Cinderella jacket (zipped), tiara, devil horns, 6 beaded necklaces, 2 watches, and she's carrying a scepter with a glittery star on top.
"Are you in league with the wicked old hag who sent my poor Giselle to this foul place...Arty?"
regrets that she no longer has the patience for Charles Dickens. (There warn't enough wittles about to tide me through whilst I plodded along...)
"But the reverence which is difficult, and which has personal merit in it, is the respect which you pay, without compulsion, to the political or religious attitude of a man whose beliefs are not yours." - Mark Twain (Following the Equator)
is being sucked into Twitter after a vicious struggle against it...
is addicted to Twitter (as I inevitably knew I would be.) Alex Stanley has an account as well...looking forward to this little experiment.
put honey on a piece of toast, where it dripped to the couch...and a blanket...and my shirt...and my jeans...and my socks...and finally down my entire arm, at which point I looked up and realized all the places I had been dripping. Sticky. Yuck.
Jumbo corndog? Check. Roasted corn? Check. Dippin' Dots? Check. Sunburned nose? Check. All in all, another successful year at Sunfest.
"All the Federales say, "Could'a had him any day" They only let him slip away out of kindness, I suppose..."
is listening to some new Taddy Porter songs
ate a cheeseburger, nearly killed a pedestrian, played at the park and flew a kite...all before noon...I need a nap.
was hoping Detroit would bring the Cup back again last night, but I'd rather see them win it at home anyway...don't fail me now, Henrik Zetterberg...and I also hope Jordan Staal gets at least an elbow or two in the process.
"I do believe in fairies. I do. I do." ...thanks a lot, guys.
just saw an ad on FB that promises "the ability to perform miracles" after attending "holistic sessions." - frightening.
is listening to the hellacious thunderstorm I've been waiting on.
- last night I cooked a huge ham and for the first time, I could picture the giant pig it used to be attached to. (I kept thinking of Phoebe on Friends - food with a face!) It didn't make it any less delicious, but I experienced a rare moment of horror.
is mourning Detroit's loss of the Stanley Cup...oh, Ozzy...what a series.
just ran a mile...okay, half ran/half walked a mile...until she saw stars and started wheezing and nearly vomited on the awesome Bruins astroturf (have you seen that field?!) Time to step up plan get-back-in-shape.
is spending the evening with mashed potatoes, beer and a Seven Nation Army.
"...We will sing, sing, sing, and make music with the heavens We will sing, sing, sing, grateful that you hear us..." - I think this song is impossible to sing without dancing. No, seriously.
Running, Day 3. I can now make it halfway before my body starts screaming. In other news, I ran out of shaving cream, thus forcing me to use Suave Kids 2-in-1 Cowabunga Coconut shampoo and body wash. Not bad.
spent 7 hours cleaning her grandparents house and then ran the daily mile...I may not be able to move tomorrow.
did 5 solid hours of shrubbery conquering madness at her grandparents' house. - It was a fair fight overall, and I'm not without battle wounds, but I think I won...unless I have poison ivy...I would consider that a draw.
wonders why people I don't know want to follow me on Twitter...stalkers.
is trying to summon the energy to clean her house for her sassy girl's 3rd birthday party tomorrow.
had an awful day. Pity party to follow...
"Abba Father, my defender, You are holy and I surrender, For in my weakness You protect me, and when my heart strays, You correct me. I cry Abba Father, I love you, Daddy..."
"mini buffalo ranch chicken sandwich" [insert motions here]
- everyone at our house now has a summer cold - it's definitely a movie day...with a lot of juice and Kleenex :)
Michael Jackson just died. Wow.
tried to find a clear shot of me in my red "Beat It" jacket and glove to post, but alas, I could not (there was a strange shot of me wearing it over a sundress with motorcycle boots and a helmet, though - I think it was my 7th birthday.)
is wondering how she can spend the next 2 weeks without Michael Westen...
made a visit to Narnia this afternoon...
may be experiencing a 1/3 life crisis...
is letting her kids jump on their beds to their hearts' content (moved their mattresses into the living room.) Someone remind them of this some day when they accuse me of not being awesome.
"I like 'em chunky."
"...Should I tell them that I am a perfect example of all You can do with a life? What should I say to them, what if I'm failing them? What should I tell them tonight?..."
had a great time with family, friends and fireworks tonight. - I also heard Josh give an audible sigh of relief when I told the kids we would talk about what Independence Day really means some other time.
thinks "jinkies," Velma should really have invested in contacts - she loses those glasses at some point in every episode of Scooby Doo.
is contemplating selling her daughter to the circus.
's daughter peed in the toilet and then put her head in it. On purpose. Repeatedly. [speechless]
- tried to explain that music lyrics are not always to be taken literally...Zac is very bothered by this and wants to know "who" is being sung to - he does not like Joe Cocker thinking he is beautiful.
watched the Harper's Island finale tonight. Am I glad I faithfully watched every episode?....hmmm...maybe?
- There's nothing like a vomiting child to start your day out right.
now owns a real cellphone...and is in the process of creating her very own Taddy Porter ringtone.
"Due to buget constraints, the light at the end of the tunnel will be turned off until further notice."
spent the afternoon at the Coffeyville waterpark (where Kasey got naked) and ended the evening at Kiddie Park. I don't know which of us is the most tired.
is wondering who wants to pay for me to see Paul McCartney in Tulsa next month?...
is contemplating the best way to turn Zac's room into the "Zac Cave" (for all his confidential/secret identity endeavours)
- Zac Cave progress: 75% complete
"If something seems too good to be true, you should shoot it, just in case."
"Come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination..."
made grilled zucchini, pickled zucchini and zucchini bread...next week I may hate zucchini.
is researching Purim...
- almost done with my Purim project...and my Esther homework, for that matter. I feel amazingly productive.
- I believe I officially like the zoo more than my kids; I think they took me there today. There was a lot of "Mom, are you done? Are you happy? Can we look at something else and then go home?"
would like to thank her husband for tilling the backyard last night. Project Garden is officially underway.
is ready to play in the dirt...and a little too excited about building pea trellises.
- pea trellises on hold. Zac's in the ER getting a better breathing treatment, Kasey's playing house with Batman and Princess Jasmine and I'm baking cookies.
Pea trellises done. Lots of vegetables planted and watered. Task for the day: organizing the kids' closets, while keeping the superhero with pneumonia and bronchitis from running - not nearly as easy as it sounds. Lego Batman, you're my only hope...
- I stepped outside for a couple of minutes, got approximately 12 mosquito bites and the largest grasshopper in North America flung itself from the bushes at me. It was all I could do not to execute the Ace Ventura 2 "They're in my hair!" maneuver.
- keeping tabs on my brothers through the latest issue of The Current - recap of DFest and their latest gig at the Cain's...both of which I missed. :(
is cancelling our first date night in nearly half a century and spending the evening with a migraine instead. Curse the Fates...
It's alive!...peas and lettuces are sprouting. :)
- gardening, massive sand castle at the lake, swimming, tiny tan lines on my little ones, glass of wine and The Rocky Horror Picture show...my day in a nutshell :)
watched parents videotaping their kids walking from the car to their classrooms (which reminded me that I forgot to take a picture of the first day yet again - I'll do it afterward...again) and thought about a discussion on glorifying mediocrity I heard recently.
is a murderer...I wanted to pull out the pumpkin vines that had pretty well run their course, but they were all hooked together, so I no longer have pumpkins in the little garden. Major gardening FAIL. It's a good thing I have more sprouting in the new garden.
is really excited about watching Ian Kinsler play some ball tonight!
"Your name is Ian!" - my favorite attempt at heckling Kinsler from the Drillers crowd tonight
just discovered a roll of toilet paper under Kasey's bed.
is home alone, watching the storm roll in - awesome.
who opened the door and let Fall in? I'm cleaning with all the windows open and it's cold!
is being consumed by consumerism and determined to stop it...Kristin, I told you reading that book was a bad idea for me :) - I've barely started it and I want to build a cabin in the woods.
"That's real rain out there gentlemen. We'll be safe for now--thank goodness we're in a bowling alley--but if George here doesn't get his dinner, any one of us could be next. "
is having a very odd week. In other news, Date Night is out to get me.
just made laundry soap and dishwashing detergent. It felt like Fight Club mixed with a visit to Silver Dollar City. Tyler Durden, meet Minnie Pearl.
is trying to avoid negativity at all costs today...it's getting pretty expensive.
is hoping dinner will somehow manifest itself tonight. I should probably have a backup plan just in case...
sweat (sweated, swat?...) completely through an entire set of clothes before 9:30 this morning (Kasey told me I smelled like our dog) humidity in full effect.
feels like Cinderella before the ball, the "trying to get everything cleaned and taken care of so she can get herself ready" part (though Cinderella didn't have to pack for 2 kids...) Thanks again to my mysterious benefactor - I owe you big time. :)
is celebrating her 7th wedding anniversary today :)
accidentally bleached yet another shirt, (stupid, stupid, stupid...) had a fantastic lunch, and is currently trying to make up time after being gone all morning.
- computer crashed, library is packed, kicked Josh away from his computer at work. Pathetic desperation.
is forever grateful to Jenny for the use of her computer...and lunch...and a Coke (it really does bring harmony to the world.)
planning and plotting and planning some more.
made homeade tortillas yesterday. Today I'm attempting Challah bread.
- FWC Amazing Racers, you better start working out now!
- Once again: FWC Amazing Racers, you've only got a couple of weeks to whip yourselves into shape. Don't say I didn't warn you. ;)
a guy eerily similiar to George Harrison was walking across the crosswalk earlier (the irony not lost on me, mind you) reminding me that The Beatles Rockband comes out tomorrow.
- overcoming the glint of commercialism...and the girl in electronics that said "What's it called? Beatles Rockband? And it comes out today?" (!) Now enjoying this fabulously rainy day, alone, in total silence, in my DC Comics PJs with a great lunch on the horizon. Life doesn't get much better than this.
- The Beatles Rockband game is now in my possession (just the game - drums are on my Christmas list.) It came after a day-long journey with a cast of characters worthy of Lewis Carroll, and included a tiny Asian woman loudly belting out "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road," an unkempt homeless man, a fat kid wiping his face on shirts for sale and a "special" employee who sang all the Beatles song titles to me as he read them.
- So, yesterday, as I'm drooling over the various Beatles displays, some guy asks what's with the all the Beatles stuff. I tell him and he says "No offense, but the Beatles were my generation; you're just a kid." Luckily he said "No offense" first, otherwise I might have killed him on the spot. (I did watch several episodes of Dexter yesterday, after all.) FYI: kid or not, The Beatles Rockband is AMAZING.
- making bread and cookies and hoping the other half of my 2-man-band isn't too sick to play tonight.
is still searching for the ever elusive perfect peanut butter cookie recipe...
has a lot of ambition, but lacks follow-through. - I did get a 78% on I Saw Her Standing There on the hard level on bass, so I guess that's something. That orange button is my enemy...
- my husband took me on a date to look at all the Halloween departments in town. He knows me all too well. :)
is planning Zac's birthday party, a garage sale, the Amazing Race and an all-out blood, guts and gore Halloween party. Whew.
- Ms. Stanley, to what do I owe this...pleasure? Zombie planning, sarcasm abounds and cheesecake for breakfast.
- Congratulations to my brothers/Taddy Porter for officially getting signed to a record deal! :)
- Happy 6th birthday to my favorite superhero, Zachary.
wants the back of my hair chopped off (it's becoming too frighteningly mullet-ish for my taste) - anyone want to volunteer?
is ready for the FWC Amazing Race - as you had better be...
It was a dark and stormy...afternoon. And now it's hailing on my patio.
- thanks Renana & Jen for saving me from hanging out with Beth Moore alone tonight. Next week will be better. :)
cannot sing like Ringo Starr - the game views this as a bad thing. Agree to disagree.
- at Kasey's MDO this morning, there were pictures of all the kids on the bulletin board, with a little bubble to the side, like they were telling what they want to be when they grow up. In the midst of the smiling 'I want to be a fireman' crowd, is Kasey, bent over and screaming "I don't know!" at the top of her lungs. Lord help us.
- Kasey's teacher wanted to discuss her "behavior" today. First Mother's Day Out, then on to a life of delinquency and crime...or she'll just turn out like me. Either way, it's frightening.
- Kasey saw Zac peeing on the tree in the backyard last night and tried to outdo him (yep, for real - poop.) She then sent her brother inside for toilet paper, which HE DID! When people ask why we're only having 2 children, let this story be my answer...did I mention the dog ate the poop?
Wow. I've never burned a batch of Sculpey quite like this one. Luckily, I was making "flesh" for Halloween. - It will now be "seared flesh."
- Taddy Porter is officially allowed to represent.
"There's a bird that nests inside you, sleeping underneath your skin. When you open up your wings to speak, I wish you'd let me in..." - love, love, love this line
is hoping her neighbors don't call the cops after watching her lug Chokin' Charlie all over the yard. Proper corpse placement is a must.
has Electricity pumping through her veins. No, really. - Hopefully it will revive me, because right now all I want to do is curl up in a ball and sleep...and cough...and sneeze...and hack like an old smoker...ugh.
- dialogue tonight between my dad and my son, who was afraid to watch The Wizard of Oz, yelling from 2 separate rooms - Dad: "It's got midgets!" Zac: "I don't like witches!" Dad: "Not witches, midgets!!!" If that's not a selling point, I don't know what is.
watched the peaceful sunrise this morning, while violently hacking like an old smoker.
is ready for a little Dave Ramsey insight.
should be doing Beth Moore homework instead of playing Mafia Wars. New plan: bake cookies, finish homework...then play Mafia Wars.
is tired of coughing. Seriously. Enough is enough.
just discovered that my "bowl o' fog" no longer produces fog. What a sad day in Mudville. Oh, well. On to Plan B.
absolutely loved the message tonight. Thanks for sharing the mysterious chips with me, Renana.
just picked peas and bellpeppers by flashlight, in my PJs. I love my garden.
just hauled out just about every pillow and blanket (and stuffed animal) we have and is preparing to spend the rest of the day watching movies, cuddled up with Kasey.
picked Zac up early after grocery shopping (aka, buying bags full of what ended up as cardboard mush) so as not to have to get the ark...I mean, the car, back out there again.
will officially be selling Avon tomorrow. ***Sending out the buy-from-me-buy-from-me-buy-from-me...*** subliminal messages. Please heed them.
- My son drew me a picture of the Beatles (complete with instruments and names), proclaimed himself "George Parisom" and is currently singing "Here Comes the Sun" at the top of his lungs. Wow.
- going to hang out with my brothers. :)
- did we skip Fall and go directly into Winter again?
needs atypical Halloween song playlist suggestions (ie: do NOT suggest Thriller)
- I've been trying to convince my body that it really isn't sick...now that I have a fever to go along with the symptoms I've been denying, I must admit defeat.
- some girl just went rummaging through the leftover yard sale in my driveway, then yelled to be let inside. After being denied entry, she yelled "Steve's in there, right?" Evidently, she had Steve on the phone, because everyone in Southport got to hear what a "mofo" Steve was on her way back to the car. Josh is never allowed to leave the house again. I have a feeling Steve's in pretty big trouble as well.
- I just scared myself with one of my own Halloween props (I actually screamed out loud.) I'll count that as a success. In other news, I accidentally dyed my hands green.
...must...summon...energy...I have a million things to do today and I don't want to do any of them. I'm so tired, I don't even want to make severed body parts. It's a new low for me.
I'm going to have a nervous breakdown before the day is over
spent the afternoon organizing a cemetery full of zombies, only to see there is a 100% chance of rain.
is in full-scale, super-scary party-planning mode. - I was also asked if I wanted to buy "some effin vodka" and then led to honest-to-goodness Effin Vodka. Sadly, I declined.
exhibited rare patience only a mother could muster, when, after waiting more than 2 hours with Zac at the doctor's office, and listening to him chatter nonstop, he turned to me and said "I can count to 100." He wasn't bluffing.
has a huge coldsore, spent nearly all day at the doctor's office, and is now running a fever. - I so do not have time for this.
horrid smell in the kitchen = dead mouse behind the refrigerator
Thank you to everyone who came to our Halloween party - it was better than I ever anticipated. I never expected to hear 20+ people singing "Livin' on a Prayer and Eye of the Tiger" at the top of their lungs in my living room. "Strum...strum, strum, strum."
just picked a handful of vegetables out of the garden, washed them, threw them in a pan and then ate them over rice. - Free food is somehow made a million times better when you grow it yourself. I heart my garden.
my son is wearing a cape, carrying an enormous tree limb across the backyard over his head in both hands, and laughing his "evil" laugh.
can't figure out why everyone who lands on a deserted island keeps trying to find a way off of it. - I'm looking for an island to get stuck on.
"It had been a wonderful evening and what I needed now, to give it the perfect ending, was a little of the Ludwig Van." Feeling restless and trapped by the 4 walls of the 'Ville. I blame Guy Fawkes.
- this drinking binge is brought to you in part by everyone who failed to drink more at my Halloween party...oh, how I wish you had all had more to drink...
The Wii Fit said told me I'd "put on a little weight" since yesterday, as though implying I were some sort of elephant and then asked me why this might be so. When I answered "I don't know" (being unhappy with their choices it gave me) it said "Are you SURE you don't know?" like I was lying. I'm thinking about breaking up with it. It's a little too nosy if you ask me...wait...is it listening to me right now?
- watching the documentary "How the Beatles Rocked the Kremlin" and I'm amazed at the lengths Russian teenagers went to illegally obtain rock and roll behind the Iron Curtain(they recorded it from Radio Luxembourg and cut it onto used X-rays.)
has a migraine that's causing her to invision putting Dora the Explorer in a choke hold.
went seriously old school and made a Christmas playlist that includes Christmas in Dixie, Pretty Paper and Marshmallow World, just to name a few winners.
nearly passed out from hula hooping. Seriously.
"This medicine is going to make him very jittery and anxious and he's probably going to be very disobedient and hard to control. Give it to him twice each day. Have a nice day!" - pharmacist "consult"
is tired of FB telling me who I haven't talked to in a while and who became friends and whatnot. - What are you, the conversation police?
Okay, I give up. I'm getting ready to pull my real garden for the winter, so I'll play some Farmville. Be my neighbor. Send me cows and chickens and whatnot.
- My house. Tonight. 6:00. Chocolate Pampered Chef Party. Be there.
is ill - and not in a hip, Beastie Boys way.
is building an army...of white blood cells. "There's also more bad news; there's been another murder (in Savannah.)"
- Day 2 of my involuntary bed-in. I hate being sick.
has moved from the bed to the couch. It's a minor improvement, but an improvement nonetheless.
spent the last 2 days dumping together every single toy her children own and went through them all one by one. We bagged together roughly 8 trash bags of toys (seriously) to give away in Christmas toy programs. It was like Santa came in reverse.
It's time for pie. "Gimme some pie!"
The tree is up. I had some pumpkin pie, followed by some chocolate cream pie and I'm saving the Marie Callendar Razzleberry pie for after my nap. Now to ask about that nap...
I've been trying to convince Zac that just because the calendar changes to the next month, it doesn't directly affect the weather. So far, I just look like an idiot.
can't say anything nice, so...well, you know.
is trying to turn that frown upside down...and to stop using awful phrases like that one.
is looking for her ear mittens to brave the parade.
may never be warm again.
is ready to board up the house and prepare for winter Jack Torrence style...minus the ax murdering part.
Joseph and at least 2 of the wise men are currently rockin' the pink Little People mini van at our house. I couldn't tell if Jesus and Mary were inside or not. They may still be in the Barbie Jeep.
- Josh just spent the last 10 minutes tracking down a smell he thought was pee, only to discover it was my new peach lipgloss.
- I just explained live TV to Zac and told him it used to be like that all the time. He looked at me in total confusion, as if I were some sort of caveman speaking gibberish.
just watched her son perform as a rapping reindeer. Simultaneously hilarious and precious, I must say.
"Well, I've never been to Heaven, but I've been to Oklahoma..."
is playing with the toys she let her kids open tonight and wondering if either child realizes how hard she had to try not to let them open them all.
- Listen for Taddy Porter singing "Shake Me" this week on Monday Night football!
is so excited to get a new sister-in-law for Christmas.
- don't forget: Taddy Porter's "Shake Me" will be on Monday Night Football tonight :)
- Why am I just now finding out the OKC Blazers no longer exist? No more "...and they still suck!" It's a sad day.
hopes Zac's new snow bibs get here before the snow does...we may have some serious snow sculpting to do this year.
is spending the night on Circle Mountain, watching the snow pour in.
is home, thanks to my parents, who let us steal their car for the night.
just successfully assembled the entire Barbie Pink Playset, including proper exact placement of all 51 decals. - I have also concluded that the Nerf shotgun with auto shell eject may be the coolest toy ever made.
is preparing to put her house back in some sort of order. It looks like Santa's bag of toys exploded in here.
is in the continual conquest of laundry and dishes and is also playing a little Donkey Kong, before moving on to the Play-doh spaghetti factory and burger builder and then settling in with her Reservoir Dogs jigsaw puzzle in front of the fire. - It's a pretty busy schedule.
just heard Taddy Porter on the entire intro to Monday Night Football! Sweet!
- what is with the snow sneak attack? One minute, I'm wondering when it will start snowing, the next, the ground is covered again. I was hoping to construct a large snow hippopotomus, but it doesn't look like I'm going to get enough building material.
- last night I dreamed I was quitting school to live in a cave made of animal skins and a huge alligator snake attacked me as I was leaving the building. Some woman there kept telling me just to walk it off.
is SO excited about the new camera she just got to go with her new Kodak printer. The kids have no idea what they're in for tomorrow...
Monday, December 28, 2009
Blizzard '09
We got a white Christmas all right. A literal blizzard. We spent Christmas Eve at my parents' house and finally borrowed their car to crawl home Christmas night.
I figure I should document my brothers' band before they achieve stardom and glamour and I forget their climb to fame. :) After every bar, pub and nightclub from Stillwater to one side of the U.S. and back again, Taddy Porter is rising to the top. Radio, TV, a tour with Saving Abel. Record deal, video shoots, the whole shebang. They were on Monday Night Football for the second week in a row tonight and they're doing a private party for New Year's Eve in Times Square in New York. I couldn't possibly be more proud if I tried. Man, I love those guys.
I figure I should document my brothers' band before they achieve stardom and glamour and I forget their climb to fame. :) After every bar, pub and nightclub from Stillwater to one side of the U.S. and back again, Taddy Porter is rising to the top. Radio, TV, a tour with Saving Abel. Record deal, video shoots, the whole shebang. They were on Monday Night Football for the second week in a row tonight and they're doing a private party for New Year's Eve in Times Square in New York. I couldn't possibly be more proud if I tried. Man, I love those guys.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Presents Vacation
The wedding was wonderful. I had a woman tell me afterward "Kasey was so beautiful and it was so cute when she sat down in front of the bridesmaids and put her flower basket on her head." *Sigh.* At least she was quiet. Zac taught everyone on the dance floor the dances he had done for his school program, along with some great breakdancing moves.
Yesterday was the first official day of Christmas break (or "presents break" as Kasey called it. That's probably really accurate, unfortunately.) The kids and I built a gingerbread house (well, Zac and I built it, while Kasey ate half of the candy meant for it) and it lasted long enough for a picture before it collapsed. Zac asked what happened and I told him a little gingerbread tornado came through and leveled the house. He didn't think my joke was even a tiny bit funny. Then, Kasey flushed about half a roll of toilet paper down the toilet, clogging the toilet. I looked for the plunger and realized the one I had thought was an extra (and had used as part of some zombie framework for Halloween) was our only plunger, so I had to take apart a skeleton to get to it. Meanwhile, I had forgotten that you have to jiggle the toilet handle to get it to stop running, so water was pouring from the toilet the entire time I was in the garage. I walked into ankle deep water that extended out into the hallway on both sides. So, all in a day's work, I guess. We're expected rain that leads to snow beginning tomorrow, so we could end up with a white Christmas this year. I'm pretty excited.
Yesterday was the first official day of Christmas break (or "presents break" as Kasey called it. That's probably really accurate, unfortunately.) The kids and I built a gingerbread house (well, Zac and I built it, while Kasey ate half of the candy meant for it) and it lasted long enough for a picture before it collapsed. Zac asked what happened and I told him a little gingerbread tornado came through and leveled the house. He didn't think my joke was even a tiny bit funny. Then, Kasey flushed about half a roll of toilet paper down the toilet, clogging the toilet. I looked for the plunger and realized the one I had thought was an extra (and had used as part of some zombie framework for Halloween) was our only plunger, so I had to take apart a skeleton to get to it. Meanwhile, I had forgotten that you have to jiggle the toilet handle to get it to stop running, so water was pouring from the toilet the entire time I was in the garage. I walked into ankle deep water that extended out into the hallway on both sides. So, all in a day's work, I guess. We're expected rain that leads to snow beginning tomorrow, so we could end up with a white Christmas this year. I'm pretty excited.
Friday, December 18, 2009
Nervous Breakdown
Oh dear goodness, where to begin?...I went to Kasey's Christmas party today and had a great time helping out. I called the school to find out when Zac's party was and they told me 1:00, so I hurried to get there, only to find out the Pre-K party was at 1:00 and his was yesterday. Mom FAIL. So, I stood there awkwardly in a classroom full of children that were not having a party for a few minutes and then signed Zac out and took him home for no reason at all. I had a killer headache from still not having any lunch at this point and both kids began their barrage of "he's touching me she's got my toy can we have mac and cheese can we open a present I don't want to do that can you tie this can you help me find my mask." You know, the usual. Josh came home with Matt's car because he took it to clean it as a favor for Matt and Jenny, to give them one less thing to do for the wedding tomorrow. When he rolled the window down, the entire window came completely out, so he spent quite a while in front of the house trying to get it back in place. He came inside to tell me he fixed it and we both looked out the door at the fixed window, and watched as our neighbor backed out of her driveway...and into the front of Matt's car. The rehearsal dinner is in a couple of hours and I'm hoping the day doesn't get too much more exciting.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Enjoyment
I saw 2 older women shopping together today and one held up a pair of men's boxers to ask the other if "he" would like them for Christmas. The woman said "Yes, I think he'll really enjoy them." Really? Enjoy? I don't think I've ever liked a pair of underwear enough to claim I enjoy them.
My son was a rapping reindeer last night in his school Christmas concert. He was too adorable for words. I managed not to cry (I usually cry at every kids' program, regardless of whether my kids are in it or not) but I did get a little teary-eyed when I realized Kasey's going to be up there singing next year. Or growling. Or chewing on her dress, like the little girl in the front row was doing. I'm about to become a wrapping reindeer myself. I'm finally done Christmas shopping. I don't get stressed about the shopping part because I LOVE buying things for other people; I just hate that I don't have the money to do it properly. I would love to give crazy presents, like paying a family's bills for the month or something unexpected of that nature. Hopefully, Dave Ramsey will whip us into shape where someday that could be possible.
My son was a rapping reindeer last night in his school Christmas concert. He was too adorable for words. I managed not to cry (I usually cry at every kids' program, regardless of whether my kids are in it or not) but I did get a little teary-eyed when I realized Kasey's going to be up there singing next year. Or growling. Or chewing on her dress, like the little girl in the front row was doing. I'm about to become a wrapping reindeer myself. I'm finally done Christmas shopping. I don't get stressed about the shopping part because I LOVE buying things for other people; I just hate that I don't have the money to do it properly. I would love to give crazy presents, like paying a family's bills for the month or something unexpected of that nature. Hopefully, Dave Ramsey will whip us into shape where someday that could be possible.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
New & Improved
I've been implementing my New Year's resolution early and, though it's already driving me crazy, so far, so good. I'm trying to budget my time better and change some of my habits, so I can get more done than just racking up high scores in Mafia Wars and Farmville (though I have time allotted for those as well.)
Kasey and I are watching the Grinch (one of my all-time favorite movies - I quote it on a daily basis) and she's trying to talk me into baking chocolate chip cookies. She just came out of the kitchen with chocolate all over her face, from the handful of chocolate chips she already managed to sneak out.
Kasey and I are watching the Grinch (one of my all-time favorite movies - I quote it on a daily basis) and she's trying to talk me into baking chocolate chip cookies. She just came out of the kitchen with chocolate all over her face, from the handful of chocolate chips she already managed to sneak out.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Courtesy
Attention morons: when you wave someone through a stop sign, you aren't extending a courtesy; you're breaking a traffic law and impeding the flow of traffic. STOP DOING IT. IT PISSES ME OFF.
Tonight began the first night of our "12 days of Christmas" and it went really well. A couple of years ago, we decided we hated the idea of the kids opening a pile of presents Christmas morning and then abandoning them to be dragged all over town to several houses and gaining more presents along the way, so we came up with a plan. We save their big present, along with 2 or 3 small ones for Christmas morning and the rest, we spread out over the 12 days prior to Christmas so they actually enjoy playing with them. Some days we only do Christmas activities, like baking cookies or making ornaments or driving around looking at lights and other nights, they get a small present to open. Tonight, the kids each opened a book and we read them and they really had a really good time.
I put together a 300 piece jigsaw puzzle tonight and reminded myself why I have a love/hate relationship with puzzles. I start out thinking it will be fun, but my OCD tendency drives me to keep going until I'm finished and my back can't take it.
Tonight began the first night of our "12 days of Christmas" and it went really well. A couple of years ago, we decided we hated the idea of the kids opening a pile of presents Christmas morning and then abandoning them to be dragged all over town to several houses and gaining more presents along the way, so we came up with a plan. We save their big present, along with 2 or 3 small ones for Christmas morning and the rest, we spread out over the 12 days prior to Christmas so they actually enjoy playing with them. Some days we only do Christmas activities, like baking cookies or making ornaments or driving around looking at lights and other nights, they get a small present to open. Tonight, the kids each opened a book and we read them and they really had a really good time.
I put together a 300 piece jigsaw puzzle tonight and reminded myself why I have a love/hate relationship with puzzles. I start out thinking it will be fun, but my OCD tendency drives me to keep going until I'm finished and my back can't take it.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Dave's Here
I'm enjoying a glass of white zinfandel, which pairs nicely with the bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch I'm eating. (I'm a big fan of the Zin, though I think Sangria would win in a fight.) I just noticed the bag of rawhides I opened for McCarty says "Not for human consumption" on it, as though I might have been tempted to start gnawing away. I'm hoping the warning is just a company covering their bases...
We have a week left of Dave Ramsey. I know it's helping me a great deal, but it's so frustrating. I feel like he's talking to people that are like "Oh, SAVE the money, I've just been throwing it down the garbage disposal each month. Thanks, Dave!" I'm very thankful for the advice and it is really going to help in the long run; I just need to keep looking on down the road instead of down at my feet.
The kids have a week left of school before they come home to drive me insane and try to kill one another. I've already written out a list of activites to do that we'll probably abandon within the first couple of hours of Christmas Break. I also refuse to call it Winter Break. I don't understand why the school systems in America are (and I love this phrase) bothered by us "trying to make Christmas a religious holiday." It's CHRISTmas - Jesus' birthday. It's a religious holiday, just like Hanukkah is a religious holiday. Deal with it or quit celebrating it as something else. I don't understand why my kids have to write letters to a fictional character (Santa) at school without my consent, but God and Jesus are such issues. Anyway, that's my soapbox rant of the day.
I made my own lotion/oil/moisturizer for winter and I'm pretty excited about it. Almost as excited as I was about making my own laundry detergent. I smell fantastic.
We have a week left of Dave Ramsey. I know it's helping me a great deal, but it's so frustrating. I feel like he's talking to people that are like "Oh, SAVE the money, I've just been throwing it down the garbage disposal each month. Thanks, Dave!" I'm very thankful for the advice and it is really going to help in the long run; I just need to keep looking on down the road instead of down at my feet.
The kids have a week left of school before they come home to drive me insane and try to kill one another. I've already written out a list of activites to do that we'll probably abandon within the first couple of hours of Christmas Break. I also refuse to call it Winter Break. I don't understand why the school systems in America are (and I love this phrase) bothered by us "trying to make Christmas a religious holiday." It's CHRISTmas - Jesus' birthday. It's a religious holiday, just like Hanukkah is a religious holiday. Deal with it or quit celebrating it as something else. I don't understand why my kids have to write letters to a fictional character (Santa) at school without my consent, but God and Jesus are such issues. Anyway, that's my soapbox rant of the day.
I made my own lotion/oil/moisturizer for winter and I'm pretty excited about it. Almost as excited as I was about making my own laundry detergent. I smell fantastic.
Friday, December 11, 2009
Frosty
The hills are alive with the sound of...arthritis. Dear Winter, suck it. Sincerely, my left knee.
It's Friday (yipee!) I just subjected my children to an evening with Gene Wilder, Willy Wonka style, as Josh is out with Matt for his bachelor party (Matt's, not Josh's.) I decided Willy Wonka may be just as brilliantly written and performed as Mary Poppins, if not more. I love and treasure them both. I'm also kicking myself for not winterizing our medicine cabinet, as I debated doing on Tuesday, because now a virus of the sneezy/sore throat variety is descending upon our entire household. I'm drowning my sorrows in tea and homeade chocolate chip cookies. I may advance to hot and sour soup tomorrow - it's my fail-safe cure for anything. Now I just have to fight against falling asleep, as this Benadryl causes my pillow to whisper sweet nothings in my ear. Zac came home from school today and told me that he's building me my own museum when he gets older. The boy knows me all too well. I was actually bummed because I'm missing the overnight CSI exhibit at the Oklahoma Science Museum tonight. I'm such a nerd. Kasey's teachers asked if we were getting a puppy for Christmas because evidently it's all she wants and she doesn't have one. I told them our dog sleeps with her in her bed at night and they both laughed hysterically. Oh, that girl. I'm missing my brothers' concert tonight in Tulsa; I wish I could have been there. At least I'll get to see them again soon.
It's Friday (yipee!) I just subjected my children to an evening with Gene Wilder, Willy Wonka style, as Josh is out with Matt for his bachelor party (Matt's, not Josh's.) I decided Willy Wonka may be just as brilliantly written and performed as Mary Poppins, if not more. I love and treasure them both. I'm also kicking myself for not winterizing our medicine cabinet, as I debated doing on Tuesday, because now a virus of the sneezy/sore throat variety is descending upon our entire household. I'm drowning my sorrows in tea and homeade chocolate chip cookies. I may advance to hot and sour soup tomorrow - it's my fail-safe cure for anything. Now I just have to fight against falling asleep, as this Benadryl causes my pillow to whisper sweet nothings in my ear. Zac came home from school today and told me that he's building me my own museum when he gets older. The boy knows me all too well. I was actually bummed because I'm missing the overnight CSI exhibit at the Oklahoma Science Museum tonight. I'm such a nerd. Kasey's teachers asked if we were getting a puppy for Christmas because evidently it's all she wants and she doesn't have one. I told them our dog sleeps with her in her bed at night and they both laughed hysterically. Oh, that girl. I'm missing my brothers' concert tonight in Tulsa; I wish I could have been there. At least I'll get to see them again soon.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Top 5 Kids
I just did a number of things I hate doing (laundry, changing the sheets, yoga, etc.) My zillion dollar vaccuum isn't working. - It doesn't suck (oh, the irony) and I'm getting ready to go back to the evil Empire to make some returns. I thought I'd take a few minutes to do some more Top 5's.
Top 5 things my children inherited from me:
Zac
1. asthma and allergies (boo!)
2. imagination and love of all things fantasy
3. storytelling
4. extreme empathy
5. night owl tendencies
I have to add that sprinkling of freckles across his nose as a runner-up
Kasey
1. crazy, wildly uncooperative hair
2. bossiness
3. wit
4. love of books
5. extreme independence
Top 5 Things the kids have inherited from Josh
Zac
1. cowlicks
2. charm
3. dislike for vegetables, ketchup, mustard and anything mildly healthy
4. social ability
5. fingernails and toenails
Kasey
1. temper
2. love of food
3. mouth and chin
4. love of animals
5. desire to instigate others
I love, love, love seeing the combination of Josh and me in all their various traits. I also love watching their own tendencies and characteristics that make them unique develop in each of them more and more every day.
Top 5 things my children inherited from me:
Zac
1. asthma and allergies (boo!)
2. imagination and love of all things fantasy
3. storytelling
4. extreme empathy
5. night owl tendencies
I have to add that sprinkling of freckles across his nose as a runner-up
Kasey
1. crazy, wildly uncooperative hair
2. bossiness
3. wit
4. love of books
5. extreme independence
Top 5 Things the kids have inherited from Josh
Zac
1. cowlicks
2. charm
3. dislike for vegetables, ketchup, mustard and anything mildly healthy
4. social ability
5. fingernails and toenails
Kasey
1. temper
2. love of food
3. mouth and chin
4. love of animals
5. desire to instigate others
I love, love, love seeing the combination of Josh and me in all their various traits. I also love watching their own tendencies and characteristics that make them unique develop in each of them more and more every day.
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